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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. So....

So....

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved General Discussion
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  • J Offline
    J Offline
    jon-nyc
    wrote on 17 Feb 2022, 22:53 last edited by jon-nyc
    #519

    Superman once challenged Chuck Norris to a fight. The loser had wear his underwear over his clothes for the rest of his life.

    Only non-witches get due process.

    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
    1 Reply Last reply
    • J Offline
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      jon-nyc
      wrote on 17 Feb 2022, 23:58 last edited by
      #520

      I just landed a senior role at Old McDonalds farm.

      I’m the CIEIO.

      Only non-witches get due process.

      • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
      1 Reply Last reply
      • J Offline
        J Offline
        jon-nyc
        wrote on 20 Feb 2022, 09:29 last edited by
        #521

        What’s the difference between a cult and a religion?

        In a cult, there’s a guy at the top who knows it’s all a scam.

        In a religion, that guy is dead.

        Only non-witches get due process.

        • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
        1 Reply Last reply
        • J Offline
          J Offline
          jon-nyc
          wrote on 20 Feb 2022, 15:32 last edited by
          #522

          During a recent password audit, a blonde woman was discovered to have the password “MickeyMinnieGoofyHueyDeweyLouisDonaldDaffySacramento”

          When asked why she said “they said it needed to be eight characters and a capital”.

          Only non-witches get due process.

          • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
          A 1 Reply Last reply 20 Feb 2022, 15:40
          • J Offline
            J Offline
            jon-nyc
            wrote on 20 Feb 2022, 15:38 last edited by
            #523

            I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan.

            They got all excited and asked if I knew how to drive a truck.

            Only non-witches get due process.

            • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
            1 Reply Last reply
            • J jon-nyc
              20 Feb 2022, 15:32

              During a recent password audit, a blonde woman was discovered to have the password “MickeyMinnieGoofyHueyDeweyLouisDonaldDaffySacramento”

              When asked why she said “they said it needed to be eight characters and a capital”.

              A Offline
              A Offline
              Axtremus
              wrote on 20 Feb 2022, 15:40 last edited by
              #524

              @jon-nyc said in So....:

              During a recent password audit, a blonde woman was discovered to have the password “MickeyMinnieGoofyHueyDeweyLouisDonaldDaffySacramento”

              When asked why she said “they said it needed to be eight characters and a capital”.

              The eight characters are fine but Sacramento is too correct.
              Perhaps make it Los Angeles or San Francisco or New York City.

              1 Reply Last reply
              • J Offline
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                jon-nyc
                wrote on 20 Feb 2022, 16:07 last edited by
                #525

                When I’m bored I’ll call the local Best Western hotel.

                When they pick up the phone and say “Best Western,” I say “True Grit with John Wayne” and hang up.

                Only non-witches get due process.

                • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                I 1 Reply Last reply 24 Feb 2022, 18:52
                • J Offline
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                  jon-nyc
                  wrote on 20 Feb 2022, 23:44 last edited by
                  #526

                  I sold my vacuum the other day.

                  All it was doing was collecting dust.

                  Only non-witches get due process.

                  • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                  G 1 Reply Last reply 21 Feb 2022, 01:23
                  • J Offline
                    J Offline
                    jon-nyc
                    wrote on 21 Feb 2022, 01:21 last edited by
                    #527

                    It's not that I like cocaine, really. I just love the way it smells.

                    Only non-witches get due process.

                    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • J jon-nyc
                      20 Feb 2022, 23:44

                      I sold my vacuum the other day.

                      All it was doing was collecting dust.

                      G Offline
                      G Offline
                      George K
                      wrote on 21 Feb 2022, 01:23 last edited by
                      #528

                      @jon-nyc said in So....:

                      sold my vacuum the other day.
                      All it was doing was collecting dust.

                      A tip of the virtual hat to everyone here who didn't descend into the "sucks" jokes.

                      @Aqua-s-Sister , I'm NOT looking at you.

                      "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                      The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      • J Offline
                        J Offline
                        jon-nyc
                        wrote on 21 Feb 2022, 01:57 last edited by
                        #529

                        Queen Pasiphae of Crete gave birth to the Minotaur, violating Bart Simpson's famous maxim "Don't have a cow-man"

                        Only non-witches get due process.

                        • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                        1 Reply Last reply
                        • J Offline
                          J Offline
                          jon-nyc
                          wrote on 21 Feb 2022, 14:17 last edited by
                          #530

                          Heavy storm over Liverpool today so they canceled all flights in and out of John Lennon Airport.

                          Imagine all the people…

                          Only non-witches get due process.

                          • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • L Offline
                            L Offline
                            Larry
                            wrote on 21 Feb 2022, 17:25 last edited by
                            #531

                            Did you hear about the blonde who divorced her husband because she got pregnant and didn't believe she was the mother?

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            • J Offline
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                              jon-nyc
                              wrote on 22 Feb 2022, 18:24 last edited by
                              #532

                              Chess players think checkers players are dumb, but I love checkers.

                              Besides, the red ones are tasty.

                              Only non-witches get due process.

                              • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                              1 Reply Last reply
                              • J Offline
                                J Offline
                                jon-nyc
                                wrote on 22 Feb 2022, 18:28 last edited by
                                #533

                                After years of bad luck with the opposite sex, I’m changing my sexual orientation.

                                I’m now officially buysexual.

                                Only non-witches get due process.

                                • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                1 Reply Last reply
                                • G Offline
                                  G Offline
                                  George K
                                  wrote on 23 Feb 2022, 00:26 last edited by
                                  #534

                                  The young couple next door to me are making a sex tape , only they don't know it yet.

                                  "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                  The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  • J Offline
                                    J Offline
                                    jon-nyc
                                    wrote on 23 Feb 2022, 02:39 last edited by
                                    #535

                                    I told my wife that the shoes she’s wearing are inappropriate for gardening.

                                    But she’s digging in her heels.

                                    Only non-witches get due process.

                                    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • J Offline
                                      J Offline
                                      jon-nyc
                                      wrote on 23 Feb 2022, 20:51 last edited by
                                      #536

                                      My ex had a tattoo of a seashell on her right thigh.

                                      If you put your left ear against it you could smell the sea.

                                      Only non-witches get due process.

                                      • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • C Offline
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                                        Catseye3
                                        wrote on 23 Feb 2022, 21:23 last edited by
                                        #537

                                        The last thing I want to do is hurt you; but it’s still on the list.

                                        Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        • C Offline
                                          C Offline
                                          Catseye3
                                          wrote on 23 Feb 2022, 21:33 last edited by
                                          #538

                                          Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

                                          😖

                                          Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

                                          L 1 Reply Last reply 24 Feb 2022, 11:46
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