So....
-
This dwarf I know wanted to quit his job to become a butcher.
But the steaks were too high.
-
Why is fat-shaming people wrong?
They already have a lot on their plate.
-
Friends are like giraffes.
If you shoot them, they die.
-
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
“Where’s my tractor????”
-
In the old west they would mount a lantern on their horse for traveling at night.
It was the first form of saddle light navigation.
-
I have a fear of over-engineered buildings.
It’s a complex complex complex.
-
Did you see the Origami Championship on TV last night? It was Pay Per View…
-
There's no need to tailgate me in the slow lane, especially when I'm going 35mph over the speed limit.
And those flashing lights on top of your car look ridiculous.
-
Remember - taking the vegetables off your double bacon cheeseburger reduces the amount of calories consumed.
-
G George K referenced this topic on
-
Boobs are like train sets. They’re met for kids but dads love them too.
Oh, and you can do more with the bigger sets.
-
So…. My girlfriend gave me a blow job on the way over to her parents house.
In hindsight we should have waited until we dropped them off.
-
So… I bought a wheelbarrow for my testicles.
It drives me nuts.
-
I don't like the word xenophobia. It just sounds foreign to me.
-
I was really struggling to get my wife's attention....
So I sat down on the sofa and looked comfortable. That did the trick.
