Another “Government Shutdown” Fight Coming? (Sep. 2023)
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Parody/satirical op-ed on House Republicans and the government shutdown:
... As America hurtles toward a government shutdown, I and my fellow GOP colleagues would like to say that, in our defense, we really didn’t know “governing” would be one of our job requirements.
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... we think government is bad and we want nothing do with it, except for the parts where we get to yell into TV cameras and share devastating Hunter Biden memes. Those parts are great!
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On Thursday, [we tanked a military funding bill that usually passes with bipartisan support]. Why? Mainly for the lulz, but also because we kind of want the government to shut down so former President Donald Trump will like us and so we can look tougher when we’re yelling into the TV cameras.
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... the truth is we aren’t doing jack on the military funding or any other funding until the DEMONcrats agree to cut all the spending we don’t like, defund the FBI and the DOJ, stop all Trump investigations and give us everything we want.
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And what is it we want? Hah! Nice try. Answering that question sounds a lot like governing, and we didn’t get into this business to dirty our hands with that kind of nonsense.
...And here's the "I don't care" part for @Jolly :
Will hundreds of thousands of federal workers be sent home without paychecks? Sure! Did the last government shutdown in 2019 cost the country $3 billion in economic activity? Heck yeah! Could national parks shut down and research at the National Institutes of Health come to a halt? You betcha!
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And do we care one iota about any of that? Nah. As long as Rep. Matt Gaetz of Florida can go on “Hannity” and flex his forehead muscles while yelling something that doesn’t mean anything, we’re right where we want to be – in government, but not governing.
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Enjoy the shutdown, suckers. We’ve got memes to post. -
And you know what? All those government employees get a paid vacation, because all of those paychecks are coming as soon as a continuing resolution is signed.
Oh, whoa is me! They're going to make me take off and pay me for it!
Whaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!
“Cry havoc and let slip the DOGE of war!”
Those who cheered as J-6 American prisoners were locked in solitary for 18 months without trial, now suddenly fight tooth and nail for foreign terrorists’ "due process". — Buck Sexton
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And you know what? All those government employees get a paid vacation, because all of those paychecks are coming as soon as a continuing resolution is signed.
Oh, whoa is me! They're going to make me take off and pay me for it!
Whaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!
@Jolly said in Another “Government Shutdown” Fight Coming? (Sep. 2023):
And you know what? All those government employees get a paid vacation, because all of those paychecks are coming as soon as a continuing resolution is signed.
Oh, woe is me! They're going to make me take off and pay me for it!
Oh, the House Republicans like to give federal government employees paid vacations! Who would’ve thunk it?
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@Jolly said in Another “Government Shutdown” Fight Coming? (Sep. 2023):
And you know what? All those government employees get a paid vacation, because all of those paychecks are coming as soon as a continuing resolution is signed.
Oh, woe is me! They're going to make me take off and pay me for it!
Oh, the House Republicans like to give federal government employees paid vacations! Who would’ve thunk it?
@Axtremus said in Another “Government Shutdown” Fight Coming? (Sep. 2023):
@Jolly said in Another “Government Shutdown” Fight Coming? (Sep. 2023):
And you know what? All those government employees get a paid vacation, because all of those paychecks are coming as soon as a continuing resolution is signed.
Oh, woe is me! They're going to make me take off and pay me for it!
Oh, the House Republicans like to give federal government employees paid vacations! Who would’ve thunk it?
I think it's mighty white of them.
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And you know what? All those government employees get a paid vacation, because all of those paychecks are coming as soon as a continuing resolution is signed.
Oh, whoa is me! They're going to make me take off and pay me for it!
Whaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!
@Jolly said in Another “Government Shutdown” Fight Coming? (Sep. 2023):
And you know what? All those government employees get a paid vacation, because all of those paychecks are coming as soon as a continuing resolution is signed.
Oh, whoa is me! They're going to make me take off and pay me for it!
Whaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!
Not all of 'em.
The last few times this has happened, some govvies did exactly as you say. Others weren't paid for that time and never recouped. Still others were paid for that time six months down the line. Depending on the budget situation your branch operates under, shutdowns can affect you very differently from someone across the street.
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If I’m not mistaken, “contractors” are not paid back for time not worked while the government is shutdown, and the US government uses a lot of contractors.
@Axtremus said in Another “Government Shutdown” Fight Coming? (Sep. 2023):
If I’m not mistaken, “contractors” are not paid back for time not worked while the government is shutdown, and the US government uses a lot of contractors.
You are mistaken. It depends on (1) how the budget for that department is handled and (2) the arrangement made between the government agency and the contracting company.
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https://www.nytimes.com/2023/09/27/us/politics/house-republicans-lloyd-austin-salary.html
House GOP voted to reduce Defense Secretary's salary to $1 (a Majorie Taylor Greene proposal), "to bar the Pentagon from implementing Mr. Biden’s climate change-related executive orders or requiring service members to receive the coronavirus vaccine", an to strip "funding for the Pentagon’s office of diversity, equity and inclusion."
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How does this work for the Congress? Eliminate their pay during a shutdown and have no chance of reimbursement.
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How does this work for the Congress? Eliminate their pay during a shutdown and have no chance of reimbursement.
@taiwan_girl said in Another “Government Shutdown” Fight Coming? (Sep. 2023):
How does this work for the Congress? Eliminate their pay during a shutdown and have no chance of reimbursement.
Works for me...
Good luck getting that passed through <checks notes> Congress.
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There is a Constitutional roadblock to suspending the pay for Congress.
The 27th Amendment:
No law, varying the compensation for the services of the Senators and Representatives, shall take effect, until an election of Representatives shall have intervened.
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There is a Constitutional roadblock to suspending the pay for Congress.
The 27th Amendment:
No law, varying the compensation for the services of the Senators and Representatives, shall take effect, until an election of Representatives shall have intervened.
@Axtremus Of course! 555
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https://www.cnn.com/2023/09/28/politics/shutdown-latest-government-funding/index.html
Congress on track for shutdown as GOP divisions on full display after late night votes
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For the 5 or so representatives, this is their peak I think. While possible, it is doubtful that the next election will result in the same Reb vs. Dem breakdown. If the Reb have a higher majority, it is possible that 6 votes will not be needed. If the Dem have the majority, then obviously, they will not be needed.
And I think that the Reb leadership has a long memory.
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Just for good measure, House Republicans reject their own funding bill one more time just before government shutdown.
