So....

[jon-nyc]

I want my kid to have everything I couldn’t afford.

Then I want to move in with him.

[jon-nyc]

I wonder if my recorded call has ever been used for quality or training purposes.

[jon-nyc]

I often wonder who Pete is and why we do things for his sake.

[LuFins Dad]

@jon-nyc said in So....:

I often wonder who Pete is and why we do things for his sake.

I always wonder what Will did to make the the Army always fire at him.

[jon-nyc]

The only time I ever get asked for sex is on medical forms.

[jon-nyc]

Of all the things that taste like chicken, it’s weird that eggs aren’t one of them.

[taiwan_girl]

@jon-nyc

[jon-nyc]

I’ve gotten quite good at ventriloquism recently.

Scared the shit out of my urologist the other day.

[Mik]

The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian War Party. The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, you are the great Lone Ranger...In honor of the Harvest Festival, YOU will be executed in three days. "Before I kill you, I grant you three requests. What is your FIRST request?'

The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse."

The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger who whispers in Silver's ear, and the Horse gallops away.

Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back. As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.

The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse. But I will still kill you in two days."
"What is your SECOND request?"

The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse. Silver is brought to him, and he again whispers in the horse's ear.

As before, Silver takes off and disappears over the horizon.

Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a voluptuous brunette, more attractive than the blonde.
She enters the Lone Rangers tent and spends the night.

The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed.
"You are indeed a man of many talents, but I will still kill you tomorrow. What is your LAST request?"

The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse...alone."

The Chief is curious, but he agrees, and Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent.

Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears, looks him square in the eye and says,
"Listen Very Carefully!!!
"FOR...THE...LAST...TIME..."
"BRING POSSE"

[jon-nyc]

Everyone told Sam not to sing.

But Samsung anyway.

[LuFins Dad]

@Mik said in So....:

The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian War Party. The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, you are the great Lone Ranger...In honor of the Harvest Festival, YOU will be executed in three days. "Before I kill you, I grant you three requests. What is your FIRST request?'

The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse."

The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger who whispers in Silver's ear, and the Horse gallops away.

Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back. As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.

The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse. But I will still kill you in two days."
"What is your SECOND request?"

The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse. Silver is brought to him, and he again whispers in the horse's ear.

As before, Silver takes off and disappears over the horizon.

Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a voluptuous brunette, more attractive than the blonde.
She enters the Lone Rangers tent and spends the night.

The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed.
"You are indeed a man of many talents, but I will still kill you tomorrow. What is your LAST request?"

The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse...alone."

The Chief is curious, but he agrees, and Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent.

Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears, looks him square in the eye and says,
"Listen Very Carefully!!!
"FOR...THE...LAST...TIME..."
"BRING POSSE"

The Lone Ranger and Tonto rode into town after a long and hot ride across the desert. The horses were overheated, so Kemosabe told Tonto to run around the horses to generate a breeze while he went into the tavern to get them all something to drink.

The masked lawman was waiting at the bar for two beers and two buckets of water when a guy came into the bar and yelled “Hey! Is that your white horse out there?” The Lone Ranger replied “Sure is, is there a problem?” The guy responded “No, but you left your Injun running”