So....

[jon-nyc]

If I make a woman breakfast in bed, a simple ‘thank you’ is enough.

None of this ‘how did you get in my house’ business, please.

[jon-nyc]

Apparently, that random guy in the parking lot was just tying his shoe and didn't actually want to play leap frog.  My bad dude, my bad.

[Larry]

Link to video

[jon-nyc]

I caught my son chewing on electrical cords so I had to ground him.

He’s doing better currently. And conducting himself properly.

[Larry]

My neighbor's wife has a whale tattoo on her ass. It used to be a porpoise.

[jon-nyc]

I guess we all have personal hang ups about our appearance.

Personally my worry is that one of my balls is bigger than the other two.

[Larry]

I was so disappointed when I heard they won't be making yardsticks any longer....

[Larry]

Doctor: "How many fingers now?"

Me: "this just isn't how I envisioned a prostate exam worked..."

[Larry]

They said schizophrenia is an illness And I should take medication.

But look who's over here and not lonely during the covid19 lockdown!.....

[Larry]

A guy walks up to a pretty girl standing next to the jukebox. "Wow - great thong!"

She slaps him in the face and walks off.

The guy says.... "Thorry... wath it thomething i thaid?"....

[Larry]

Scientists have discovered a way to milk sheep.

Just release a new iPhone every year.

[Larry]

Did Charles Darwin die of natural causes?

[Larry]

Joe Biden was all excited. His test came back negative.

Not even Kamala Harris has the heart to tell him he had taken an IQ test.

[Horace]

@Larry said in So....:

Scientists have discovered a way to milk sheep.

Just release a new iPhone every year.

I think humor has a time and a place, but maybe we should shut this thread down if this is the direction it's headed.

[Mik]

@Horace said in So....:

@Larry said in So....:

Scientists have discovered a way to milk sheep.

Just release a new iPhone every year.

I think humor has a time and a place, but maybe we should shut this thread down if this is the direction it's headed.

AAPLied science in humor.

[jon-nyc]

My wife says I have two faults.

I don’t listen and something else.

[George K]

Would masturbating while smoking weed be considered masturblazing, weedwhacking, or highjacking?

[Larry]

I don't get it.... every w/o an likes to be swept off her feet...

But the minute you try to stuff her in the trunk.......

[Larry]

Are people in Wal-Mart called Walmartians?

[George K]

Genie: I shall grant you 3 wishes

Me: I wish for a world without lawyers

Genie: Done, you have no more wishes

Me: But you said 3

Genie: Sue me.