So....

[Larry]

I'm getting sick and tired of pretentious pricks trying to impress everyone by mentioning Mozart as if that makes them appear "cultured"...,,

When the assholes have probably never even seen one of his paintings.....

[Larry]

So.......

You'd think that by now Bon Jovi would be more than halfway there...

[Larry]

The most common cause of dry skin:

Towels

[MainerMikeBrown]

What's the most common cause of athlete's foot?

Just curious.

[Horace]

@mainermikebrown said in So....:

What's the most common cause of athlete's foot?

Athletes.

[George K]

@horace said in So....:

Athletes.

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get....

[Larry]

@george-k said in So....:

@horace said in So....:

Athletes.

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get....

If they get Olive oil out of olives, and corn oil out of corn...

Where are they getting baby oil?

@george-k said in So....:

@horace said in So....:

Athletes.

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get....

If they get olive oil out of olives, and corn oil out of corn...

Where are they getting baby oil?

[Larry]

The Mother Superior calls a meeting with all the nuns in the convent.

She says "Ladies, we have a case of ghonnorhea in the convent!"

One nun looks at another nun and says "well, Good! I was getting a little tired of Chardonnay..".

[Larry]

So......

I just found out that the company that makes yardsticks won't be making them any longer..,,

[jon-nyc]

@larry said in So....:

So......

I just found out that the company that makes yardsticks won't be making them any longer..,,

Who told you that? I'd like to meter.

[Catseye3]

@jon-nyc said in So....:

Who told you that? I'd like to meter.

[Larry]

@jon-nyc said in So....:

@larry said in So....:

So......

I just found out that the company that makes yardsticks won't be making them any longer..,,

Who told you that? I'd like to meter.

Not telling.. you'd just try to inch your way into her good graces. So I'm afraid I must put my foot down...

[jon-nyc]

Termite walks into a bar and asks, “Is the bar tender here?”

[Catseye3]

@jon-nyc

[Aqua Letifer]

@jon-nyc said in So....:

Termite walks into a bar and asks, “Is the bar tender here?”

The bar is indeed tender for all debts, public and private.

[jon-nyc]

A recent study found that people who take their coffee black are more likely to exhibit psychopathic traits.

And people who order a quad shot, non-fat, vanilla soy, extra foam, light whip with Carmel drizzle are more likely to be their victims.

[Catseye3]

@jon-nyc There, you see? Some things make perfect sense.

[MainerMikeBrown]

So....my front lawn is rather green because of all the rain we've been getting here in southern Maine lately.

I'll have to mow it tomorrow.

[Larry]

Teacher: Little Johnny, what comes after 69?

Little Johnny: mouthwash.....

[jon-nyc]

I asked Aqua’s sister to 68.

She said “you mean 69”?

I said, “No, 68. You blow me and I’ll owe you one”.