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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread

The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread

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  • George KG George K

    Q: If you could have sex with a celebrity, dead or alive, which would it be?

    A: Alive. Definitely alive.

    MikM Offline
    MikM Offline
    Mik
    wrote on last edited by
    #1260

    @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

    Q: If you could have sex with a celebrity, dead or alive, which would it be?

    A: Alive. Definitely alive.

    🤣🤣🤣

    “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

    1 Reply Last reply
    • George KG Offline
      George KG Offline
      George K
      wrote on last edited by
      #1261

      Just landed a date with a girl from Thailand!

      Hope I don't end up blowing It.

      "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

      The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

      1 Reply Last reply
      • jon-nycJ Offline
        jon-nycJ Offline
        jon-nyc
        wrote on last edited by jon-nyc
        #1262

        New £20 is out.

        5525c627-75c1-4180-90c6-38620f1f4818.jpeg

        Only non-witches get due process.

        • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
        1 Reply Last reply
        • George KG Offline
          George KG Offline
          George K
          wrote on last edited by
          #1263

          What do nine out of ten people enjoy?

          ***NSFW content***

          click to show

          Gang rape.

          "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

          The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

          LuFins DadL 1 Reply Last reply
          • George KG George K

            What do nine out of ten people enjoy?

            ***NSFW content***

            click to show

            Gang rape.

            LuFins DadL Offline
            LuFins DadL Offline
            LuFins Dad
            wrote on last edited by
            #1264

            @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

            What do nine out of ten people enjoy?

            ***NSFW content***

            click to show

            Gang rape.

            You owe me cheap Irish whiskey at a high end restaurant price…

            The Brad

            1 Reply Last reply
            • George KG Offline
              George KG Offline
              George K
              wrote on last edited by
              #1265

              A single sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it. That means a normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1,587.5TB

              That's a lot of information to swallow.

              "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

              The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

              AxtremusA 1 Reply Last reply
              • jon-nycJ Offline
                jon-nycJ Offline
                jon-nyc
                wrote on last edited by jon-nyc
                #1266

                AWS got nothin on aqua’s sister when it comes to storing massive amounts of other people’s data.

                Only non-witches get due process.

                • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                1 Reply Last reply
                • jon-nycJ Offline
                  jon-nycJ Offline
                  jon-nyc
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #1267

                  108d3954-2de7-40fc-ad03-725a2e0b530a.jpeg

                  Only non-witches get due process.

                  • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                  1 Reply Last reply
                  • George KG Offline
                    George KG Offline
                    George K
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #1268

                    GF2_81WXAAAkgL3.jpeg

                    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • bachophileB Offline
                      bachophileB Offline
                      bachophile
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #1269

                      https://www.nytimes.com/2024/02/09/style/smart-sex-toys-data.html

                      ill just copy paste the pertinent parts for those without a nytimes subscription

                      and i thought occasionally checking my garmin watch for my health stats was too obsessive

                      Can you optimize an orgasm?

                      After Melissa, a 35-year-old event planner living in Chicago, masturbates, she sometimes studies a chart that resembles the output of a heart rate monitor or that of a seismograph capturing an earthquake.

                      The data is generated by her vibrator, the Lioness, which measures her arousal and uploads information about her orgasm patterns to the company’s app. The sensors embedded in the toy track her pelvic floor movements. With each involuntary squeeze and release of her pelvic floor muscles, the app displays a graph showing her rhythmic pattern in a series of peaks and valleys. She typically uses it in tandem with her other clitoral stimulating vibrators, so that she can compare the orgasms she experiences with each one.

                      “I use it just as a data collection dildo, essentially,” said Melissa, who asked to be identified only by her first name because of privacy concerns. Besides the Lioness, she doesn’t own any wearable activity trackers, like the popular Apple Watch or Fitbit, but she says she likes “to have quantifiable information when I’m learning things.”

                      George KG 1 Reply Last reply
                      • bachophileB bachophile

                        https://www.nytimes.com/2024/02/09/style/smart-sex-toys-data.html

                        ill just copy paste the pertinent parts for those without a nytimes subscription

                        and i thought occasionally checking my garmin watch for my health stats was too obsessive

                        Can you optimize an orgasm?

                        After Melissa, a 35-year-old event planner living in Chicago, masturbates, she sometimes studies a chart that resembles the output of a heart rate monitor or that of a seismograph capturing an earthquake.

                        The data is generated by her vibrator, the Lioness, which measures her arousal and uploads information about her orgasm patterns to the company’s app. The sensors embedded in the toy track her pelvic floor movements. With each involuntary squeeze and release of her pelvic floor muscles, the app displays a graph showing her rhythmic pattern in a series of peaks and valleys. She typically uses it in tandem with her other clitoral stimulating vibrators, so that she can compare the orgasms she experiences with each one.

                        “I use it just as a data collection dildo, essentially,” said Melissa, who asked to be identified only by her first name because of privacy concerns. Besides the Lioness, she doesn’t own any wearable activity trackers, like the popular Apple Watch or Fitbit, but she says she likes “to have quantifiable information when I’m learning things.”

                        George KG Offline
                        George KG Offline
                        George K
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #1270

                        @bachophile I wonder if she has tried a banana.

                        "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                        The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        • George KG Offline
                          George KG Offline
                          George K
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #1271

                          GGAE6iEWoAApDFB.jpeg

                          "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                          The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                          LuFins DadL 1 Reply Last reply
                          • George KG George K

                            A single sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it. That means a normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1,587.5TB

                            That's a lot of information to swallow.

                            AxtremusA Offline
                            AxtremusA Offline
                            Axtremus
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #1272

                            @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

                            A single sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it. That means a normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1,587.5TB

                            Lots of redundancy in the data, though. Once compressed, probably only a very small fraction of that 1,587.5TB will remain unique.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            • jon-nycJ Offline
                              jon-nycJ Offline
                              jon-nyc
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #1273

                              image000000.jpeg

                              Only non-witches get due process.

                              • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                              1 Reply Last reply
                              • George KG George K

                                GGAE6iEWoAApDFB.jpeg

                                LuFins DadL Offline
                                LuFins DadL Offline
                                LuFins Dad
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #1274

                                @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

                                GGAE6iEWoAApDFB.jpeg

                                Lucas once told/asked us “What’s the difference between a park bench and an adult black man? The park bench can support a family…”

                                Now the same kid is VP of the Diversity and Equity Club at College. Where did I go wrong?

                                The Brad

                                HoraceH 1 Reply Last reply
                                • George KG Offline
                                  George KG Offline
                                  George K
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #1275

                                  GGvsxuxWsAAUqwg.jpeg

                                  "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                  The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  • George KG Offline
                                    George KG Offline
                                    George K
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #1276

                                    428603591_235968846250988_4973398357464772928_n.jpg

                                    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • Doctor PhibesD Offline
                                      Doctor PhibesD Offline
                                      Doctor Phibes
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #1277

                                      image.png

                                      I was only joking

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • George KG Offline
                                        George KG Offline
                                        George K
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #1278

                                        IMG_0229.jpeg

                                        "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                        The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                        LuFins DadL 1 Reply Last reply
                                        • George KG George K

                                          IMG_0229.jpeg

                                          LuFins DadL Offline
                                          LuFins DadL Offline
                                          LuFins Dad
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #1279

                                          @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

                                          IMG_0229.jpeg

                                          Took me a minute…

                                          The Brad

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