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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread

The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread

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  • George KG Offline
    George KG Offline
    George K
    wrote on last edited by
    #1259

    Q: If you could have sex with a celebrity, dead or alive, which would it be?

    A: Alive. Definitely alive.

    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

    MikM 1 Reply Last reply
    • George KG George K

      Q: If you could have sex with a celebrity, dead or alive, which would it be?

      A: Alive. Definitely alive.

      MikM Offline
      MikM Offline
      Mik
      wrote on last edited by
      #1260

      @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

      Q: If you could have sex with a celebrity, dead or alive, which would it be?

      A: Alive. Definitely alive.

      🤣🤣🤣

      “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

      1 Reply Last reply
      • George KG Offline
        George KG Offline
        George K
        wrote on last edited by
        #1261

        Just landed a date with a girl from Thailand!

        Hope I don't end up blowing It.

        "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

        The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

        1 Reply Last reply
        • jon-nycJ Offline
          jon-nycJ Offline
          jon-nyc
          wrote on last edited by jon-nyc
          #1262

          New £20 is out.

          5525c627-75c1-4180-90c6-38620f1f4818.jpeg

          Only non-witches get due process.

          • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
          1 Reply Last reply
          • George KG Offline
            George KG Offline
            George K
            wrote on last edited by
            #1263

            What do nine out of ten people enjoy?

            ***NSFW content***

            click to show

            Gang rape.

            "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

            The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

            LuFins DadL 1 Reply Last reply
            • George KG George K

              What do nine out of ten people enjoy?

              ***NSFW content***

              click to show

              Gang rape.

              LuFins DadL Offline
              LuFins DadL Offline
              LuFins Dad
              wrote on last edited by
              #1264

              @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

              What do nine out of ten people enjoy?

              ***NSFW content***

              click to show

              Gang rape.

              You owe me cheap Irish whiskey at a high end restaurant price…

              The Brad

              1 Reply Last reply
              • George KG Offline
                George KG Offline
                George K
                wrote on last edited by
                #1265

                A single sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it. That means a normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1,587.5TB

                That's a lot of information to swallow.

                "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                AxtremusA 1 Reply Last reply
                • jon-nycJ Offline
                  jon-nycJ Offline
                  jon-nyc
                  wrote on last edited by jon-nyc
                  #1266

                  AWS got nothin on aqua’s sister when it comes to storing massive amounts of other people’s data.

                  Only non-witches get due process.

                  • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                  1 Reply Last reply
                  • jon-nycJ Offline
                    jon-nycJ Offline
                    jon-nyc
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #1267

                    108d3954-2de7-40fc-ad03-725a2e0b530a.jpeg

                    Only non-witches get due process.

                    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • George KG Offline
                      George KG Offline
                      George K
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #1268

                      GF2_81WXAAAkgL3.jpeg

                      "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                      The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      • bachophileB Offline
                        bachophileB Offline
                        bachophile
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #1269

                        https://www.nytimes.com/2024/02/09/style/smart-sex-toys-data.html

                        ill just copy paste the pertinent parts for those without a nytimes subscription

                        and i thought occasionally checking my garmin watch for my health stats was too obsessive

                        Can you optimize an orgasm?

                        After Melissa, a 35-year-old event planner living in Chicago, masturbates, she sometimes studies a chart that resembles the output of a heart rate monitor or that of a seismograph capturing an earthquake.

                        The data is generated by her vibrator, the Lioness, which measures her arousal and uploads information about her orgasm patterns to the company’s app. The sensors embedded in the toy track her pelvic floor movements. With each involuntary squeeze and release of her pelvic floor muscles, the app displays a graph showing her rhythmic pattern in a series of peaks and valleys. She typically uses it in tandem with her other clitoral stimulating vibrators, so that she can compare the orgasms she experiences with each one.

                        “I use it just as a data collection dildo, essentially,” said Melissa, who asked to be identified only by her first name because of privacy concerns. Besides the Lioness, she doesn’t own any wearable activity trackers, like the popular Apple Watch or Fitbit, but she says she likes “to have quantifiable information when I’m learning things.”

                        George KG 1 Reply Last reply
                        • bachophileB bachophile

                          https://www.nytimes.com/2024/02/09/style/smart-sex-toys-data.html

                          ill just copy paste the pertinent parts for those without a nytimes subscription

                          and i thought occasionally checking my garmin watch for my health stats was too obsessive

                          Can you optimize an orgasm?

                          After Melissa, a 35-year-old event planner living in Chicago, masturbates, she sometimes studies a chart that resembles the output of a heart rate monitor or that of a seismograph capturing an earthquake.

                          The data is generated by her vibrator, the Lioness, which measures her arousal and uploads information about her orgasm patterns to the company’s app. The sensors embedded in the toy track her pelvic floor movements. With each involuntary squeeze and release of her pelvic floor muscles, the app displays a graph showing her rhythmic pattern in a series of peaks and valleys. She typically uses it in tandem with her other clitoral stimulating vibrators, so that she can compare the orgasms she experiences with each one.

                          “I use it just as a data collection dildo, essentially,” said Melissa, who asked to be identified only by her first name because of privacy concerns. Besides the Lioness, she doesn’t own any wearable activity trackers, like the popular Apple Watch or Fitbit, but she says she likes “to have quantifiable information when I’m learning things.”

                          George KG Offline
                          George KG Offline
                          George K
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #1270

                          @bachophile I wonder if she has tried a banana.

                          "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                          The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • George KG Offline
                            George KG Offline
                            George K
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #1271

                            GGAE6iEWoAApDFB.jpeg

                            "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                            The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                            LuFins DadL 1 Reply Last reply
                            • George KG George K

                              A single sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it. That means a normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1,587.5TB

                              That's a lot of information to swallow.

                              AxtremusA Offline
                              AxtremusA Offline
                              Axtremus
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #1272

                              @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

                              A single sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it. That means a normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1,587.5TB

                              Lots of redundancy in the data, though. Once compressed, probably only a very small fraction of that 1,587.5TB will remain unique.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              • jon-nycJ Offline
                                jon-nycJ Offline
                                jon-nyc
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #1273

                                image000000.jpeg

                                Only non-witches get due process.

                                • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                1 Reply Last reply
                                • George KG George K

                                  GGAE6iEWoAApDFB.jpeg

                                  LuFins DadL Offline
                                  LuFins DadL Offline
                                  LuFins Dad
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #1274

                                  @George-K said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

                                  GGAE6iEWoAApDFB.jpeg

                                  Lucas once told/asked us “What’s the difference between a park bench and an adult black man? The park bench can support a family…”

                                  Now the same kid is VP of the Diversity and Equity Club at College. Where did I go wrong?

                                  The Brad

                                  HoraceH 1 Reply Last reply
                                  • George KG Offline
                                    George KG Offline
                                    George K
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #1275

                                    GGvsxuxWsAAUqwg.jpeg

                                    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • George KG Offline
                                      George KG Offline
                                      George K
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #1276

                                      428603591_235968846250988_4973398357464772928_n.jpg

                                      "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                      The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • Doctor PhibesD Offline
                                        Doctor PhibesD Offline
                                        Doctor Phibes
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #1277

                                        image.png

                                        I was only joking

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        • George KG Offline
                                          George KG Offline
                                          George K
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #1278

                                          IMG_0229.jpeg

                                          "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                          The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                          LuFins DadL 1 Reply Last reply
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