Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Tags
  • Popular
  • Users
  • Groups
Skins
  • Light
  • Cerulean
  • Cosmo
  • Flatly
  • Journal
  • Litera
  • Lumen
  • Lux
  • Materia
  • Minty
  • Morph
  • Pulse
  • Sandstone
  • Simplex
  • Sketchy
  • Spacelab
  • United
  • Yeti
  • Zephyr
  • Dark
  • Cyborg
  • Darkly
  • Quartz
  • Slate
  • Solar
  • Superhero
  • Vapor

  • Default (No Skin)
  • No Skin
Collapse

The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. So....

So....

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved General Discussion
1.0k Posts 26 Posters 96.0k Views
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • C Offline
    C Offline
    Catseye3
    wrote on 19 Jun 2023, 15:26 last edited by
    #856

    Link to video

    Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

    1 Reply Last reply
    • C Offline
      C Offline
      Catseye3
      wrote on 24 Jun 2023, 16:07 last edited by
      #857

      California was the first state to make it illegal to smoke cigarettes indoors. Ever since then, the whole state has been on fire. -- Comic Tommy Drake

      Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

      1 Reply Last reply
      • topic:timeago-later,24 days
      • T Offline
        T Offline
        taiwan_girl
        wrote on 19 Jul 2023, 01:27 last edited by
        #858

        So,

        alt text

        J 1 Reply Last reply 19 Jul 2023, 01:37
        • T taiwan_girl
          19 Jul 2023, 01:27

          So,

          alt text

          J Offline
          J Offline
          Jon
          wrote on 19 Jul 2023, 01:37 last edited by
          #859

          @taiwan_girl said in So....:

          So,

          alt text

          Fewer.

          T 1 Reply Last reply 19 Jul 2023, 01:44
          • J Jon
            19 Jul 2023, 01:37

            @taiwan_girl said in So....:

            So,

            alt text

            Fewer.

            T Offline
            T Offline
            taiwan_girl
            wrote on 19 Jul 2023, 01:44 last edited by
            #860

            @Jon LOL

            1 Reply Last reply
            • J Offline
              J Offline
              Jon
              wrote on 19 Jul 2023, 11:54 last edited by
              #861

              I dropped my glasses in the toilet.

              Now I can’t see shit.

              1 Reply Last reply
              • topic:timeago-later,7 days
              • J Offline
                J Offline
                Jon
                wrote on 26 Jul 2023, 14:14 last edited by
                #862

                I saw a microbiologist today.

                He was much bigger than I expected.

                1 Reply Last reply
                • G Offline
                  G Offline
                  George K
                  wrote on 31 Jul 2023, 00:27 last edited by
                  #863

                  People are moaning about the weather.

                  At least it’s not snowing.

                  Imagine shoveling snow in this heat!

                  "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                  The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  • topic:timeago-later,16 days
                  • J Offline
                    J Offline
                    jon-nyc
                    wrote on 15 Aug 2023, 22:20 last edited by
                    #864

                    There's nothing like putting on a warm pair of underwear fresh from the dryer.

                    Plus its fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.

                    Only non-witches get due process.

                    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • J Offline
                      J Offline
                      jon-nyc
                      wrote on 20 Aug 2023, 11:21 last edited by
                      #865

                      It occurred to me that in order to not expose his identity, Batman was either driving the Batmobile uninsured or committing insurance fraud.

                      Only non-witches get due process.

                      • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                      1 Reply Last reply
                      • topic:timeago-later,7 days
                      • G Offline
                        G Offline
                        George K
                        wrote on 27 Aug 2023, 12:54 last edited by
                        #866

                        image.jpeg

                        "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                        The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        • J Offline
                          J Offline
                          jon-nyc
                          wrote on 27 Aug 2023, 16:45 last edited by
                          #867

                          Cop: you were going extremely fast

                          Me: I was just trying to keep up with traffic.

                          Cop: But there isn’t any

                          Me: that’s how far behind I was.

                          Only non-witches get due process.

                          • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • topic:timeago-later,11 days
                          • J Offline
                            J Offline
                            jon-nyc
                            wrote on 8 Sept 2023, 00:45 last edited by
                            #868

                            Me: Welcome to my man cave

                            Proctologist: Please stop calling it that

                            Only non-witches get due process.

                            • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                            G 1 Reply Last reply 8 Sept 2023, 00:47
                            • J jon-nyc
                              8 Sept 2023, 00:45

                              Me: Welcome to my man cave

                              Proctologist: Please stop calling it that

                              G Offline
                              G Offline
                              George K
                              wrote on 8 Sept 2023, 00:47 last edited by
                              #869

                              @jon-nyc .

                              alt text

                              "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                              The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              • G Offline
                                G Offline
                                George K
                                wrote on 10 Sept 2023, 22:23 last edited by
                                #870

                                My wife says I’m a sex machine.

                                Actually, she says I'm a "fucking tool" but I know what she means.

                                "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                • G Offline
                                  G Offline
                                  George K
                                  wrote on 12 Sept 2023, 21:25 last edited by
                                  #871

                                  Screenshot 2023-09-12 at 4.25.10 PM.png

                                  "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                  The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  • J Offline
                                    J Offline
                                    jon-nyc
                                    wrote on 18 Sept 2023, 19:41 last edited by
                                    #872

                                    My friend Dwayne recently moved to Africa.

                                    I miss Dwayne, down in Africa.

                                    Only non-witches get due process.

                                    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • topic:timeago-later,11 days
                                    • J Offline
                                      J Offline
                                      jon-nyc
                                      wrote on 29 Sept 2023, 12:12 last edited by jon-nyc
                                      #873

                                      I ordered a new axe from overseas.

                                      I always thought it would be cool to have a foreign axe sent.

                                      Only non-witches get due process.

                                      • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • G Offline
                                        G Offline
                                        George K
                                        wrote on 2 Oct 2023, 13:00 last edited by
                                        #874

                                        He: My girlfriend started smoking. What should I do?

                                        His Friend: Slow down and use lube.

                                        "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                        The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        • I Offline
                                          I Offline
                                          Ivorythumper
                                          wrote on 5 Oct 2023, 23:14 last edited by
                                          #875

                                          There was a man in Bulgaria who drove a train for a living.

                                          He loved his job, driving a train had been his dream ever since he was a child. He loved to make the train go as fast as possible.

                                          Unfortunately, one day he was a little too reckless and caused a crash. He made it out, but a single person died.

                                          Well, needless to say, he went to court over this incident. He was found guilty, and was sentenced to death by electrocution.

                                          When the day of the execution came, he requested a single banana as his last meal. After eating the banana, he was strapped into the electric chair.

                                          The switch was flown, sparks flew and smoke filled the air- but nothing happened. The man was perfectly fine.

                                          Well, at the time, there was an old Bulgarian law that said a failed execution was a sign of divine intervention, so the man was allowed to go free.

                                          And somehow, he managed to get his old job back driving the train. Having not learned his lesson at all, he went right back to driving the train with reckless abandon. Once again, he caused a train to crash, this time killing two people.

                                          The trial went much the same as the first, resulting in a sentence of execution. For his final meal, the man requested two bananas. After eating the bananas, he was strapped into the electric chair. The switch was thrown, sparks flew, smoke filled the room- and the man was once again unharmed.

                                          Well, this of course meant that he was free to go. And once again, he somehow manages to get his old job back. To what should have been the surprise of no one, he crashed yet another train and killed three people.

                                          And so he once again found himself being sentenced to death. On the day of his execution, he requested his final meal--three bananas.

                                          "You know what? No," said the executioner. "I've had it with you and your stupid bananas and walking out of here unharmed. I'm not giving you a thing to eat, we're strapping you in and doing this now."

                                          Well, it was against protocol, but the man was strapped into the electric chair without a last meal. The switch was pulled, sparks flew, smoke filled the room- and the man was still unharmed. The executioner was speechless.

                                          The man looked at the executioner and said "Oh, the bananas had nothing to do with it. I'm just a bad conductor."

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          Reply
                                          • Reply as topic
                                          Log in to reply
                                          • Oldest to Newest
                                          • Newest to Oldest
                                          • Most Votes

                                          865/1005

                                          20 Aug 2023, 11:21


                                          • Login

                                          • Don't have an account? Register

                                          • Login or register to search.
                                          865 out of 1005
                                          • First post
                                            865/1005
                                            Last post
                                          0
                                          • Categories
                                          • Recent
                                          • Tags
                                          • Popular
                                          • Users
                                          • Groups