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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. So....

So....

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved General Discussion
1.0k Posts 26 Posters 98.8k Views
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  • L Offline
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    Larry
    wrote on 7 Aug 2020, 01:53 last edited by
    #80

    My wife is a sexaholic. No matter what time of day or night my wife always wants to make love, I can't even brush my teeth without her humping me.

    Ealier I went to the kitchen for a gllllas of wattrr an myy wif e un ziiipp ed panntss a nd themn adwrer sdoa akdbw aldb tees yhalfb hdjjwj snkkdbf jskdnruw.

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    • L Offline
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      Larry
      wrote on 7 Aug 2020, 01:56 last edited by
      #81

      Would it be wrong to follow rioters home and then burn their houses down? Asking for a friend..

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        Larry
        wrote on 7 Aug 2020, 02:02 last edited by Larry 8 Nov 2020, 23:28
        #82

        A hunter on safari came across a dead elephant with a pigmy standing beside it. The hunter asked the pygmy if he had killed it.

        "Yes. "
        "How Did a little guy like you kill such a large animal?"
        "I killed it with my club."
        "Damn! How big is your club?"
        "There's about 200 of us, I think..."

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          Larry
          wrote on 7 Aug 2020, 02:05 last edited by
          #83

          My best friend passed away years ago.

          Grieving before his grave I said,

          “Bro, I really miss you. My wife has been pregnant for 8 months now. How about you reincarnate as my child?

          A month later, my wife gave birth to a baby boy. As my child grows older I realize he looks a lot like my best friend.

          I’m really happy my prayer worked.

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          • L Offline
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            Larry
            wrote on 7 Aug 2020, 02:08 last edited by
            #84

            Two dogs are talking. One says "I can't remember your name but your fece's familiar...."

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              Larry
              wrote on 7 Aug 2020, 02:10 last edited by
              #85

              So i said "Doc, you got anything i could take for my kleptomania?"....

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                Larry
                wrote on 7 Aug 2020, 02:17 last edited by
                #86

                Welcome to the National Sarcasm Society.

                Like we need your support....

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                • J Online
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                  jon-nyc
                  wrote on 11 Aug 2020, 21:42 last edited by
                  #87

                  If I make a woman breakfast in bed, a simple ‘thank you’ is enough.

                  None of this ‘how did you get in my house’ business, please.

                  "You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from."
                  -Cormac McCarthy

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                    jon-nyc
                    wrote on 13 Aug 2020, 00:36 last edited by
                    #88

                    Apparently, that random guy in the parking lot was just tying his shoe and didn't actually want to play leap frog.  My bad dude, my bad.

                    "You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from."
                    -Cormac McCarthy

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                      Larry
                      wrote on 13 Aug 2020, 03:04 last edited by
                      #89

                      Link to video

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                        jon-nyc
                        wrote on 13 Aug 2020, 03:35 last edited by
                        #90

                        I caught my son chewing on electrical cords so I had to ground him.

                        He’s doing better currently. And conducting himself properly.

                        "You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from."
                        -Cormac McCarthy

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                          Larry
                          wrote on 13 Aug 2020, 04:34 last edited by
                          #91

                          My neighbor's wife has a whale tattoo on her ass. It used to be a porpoise.

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                            jon-nyc
                            wrote on 14 Aug 2020, 22:00 last edited by
                            #92

                            I guess we all have personal hang ups about our appearance.

                            Personally my worry is that one of my balls is bigger than the other two.

                            "You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from."
                            -Cormac McCarthy

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                            • L Offline
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                              Larry
                              wrote on 15 Aug 2020, 00:04 last edited by
                              #93

                              I was so disappointed when I heard they won't be making yardsticks any longer....

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                                Larry
                                wrote on 18 Aug 2020, 15:33 last edited by
                                #94

                                Doctor: "How many fingers now?"

                                Me: "this just isn't how I envisioned a prostate exam worked..."

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                                • L Offline
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                                  Larry
                                  wrote on 18 Aug 2020, 15:36 last edited by
                                  #95

                                  They said schizophrenia is an illness And I should take medication.

                                  But look who's over here and not lonely during the covid19 lockdown!.....

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                                    Larry
                                    wrote on 18 Aug 2020, 15:41 last edited by
                                    #96

                                    A guy walks up to a pretty girl standing next to the jukebox. "Wow - great thong!"

                                    She slaps him in the face and walks off.

                                    The guy says.... "Thorry... wath it thomething i thaid?"....

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                                    • L Offline
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                                      Larry
                                      wrote on 18 Aug 2020, 15:59 last edited by
                                      #97

                                      Scientists have discovered a way to milk sheep.

                                      Just release a new iPhone every year.

                                      H 1 Reply Last reply 18 Aug 2020, 19:57
                                      • L Offline
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                                        Larry
                                        wrote on 18 Aug 2020, 16:00 last edited by
                                        #98

                                        Did Charles Darwin die of natural causes?

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                                          Larry
                                          wrote on 18 Aug 2020, 16:06 last edited by
                                          #99

                                          Joe Biden was all excited. His test came back negative.

                                          Not even Kamala Harris has the heart to tell him he had taken an IQ test.

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                                          13 Aug 2020, 03:04

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