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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. So....

So....

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved General Discussion
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  • J jon-nyc
    8 May 2022, 13:37

    My buddy was bragging that his 3D printer could print a gun. But I wasn’t impressed.

    I’ve had a Canon printer for years.

    G Offline
    G Offline
    George K
    wrote on 9 May 2022, 22:16 last edited by
    #648

    @jon-nyc said in So....:

    My buddy was bragging that his 3D printer could print a gun. But I wasn’t impressed.

    I’ve had a Canon printer for years.

    Stealing....

    The longest drum solo in history lasted 10 hours and 43 minutes.

    It was performed by the kid sitting behind me on Delta 237 from LA to Tokyo.

    Yeah, that one too.

    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

    1 Reply Last reply
    • J Online
      J Online
      jon-nyc
      wrote on 13 May 2022, 09:56 last edited by
      #649

      I just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick an ice cube up off the kitchen floor.

      You were warned.

      1 Reply Last reply
      • J Online
        J Online
        jon-nyc
        wrote on 14 May 2022, 21:15 last edited by
        #650

        Anybody can masturbate under a sheet.

        But it takes real skill to do it without the hairdresser noticing.

        You were warned.

        1 Reply Last reply
        • L Offline
          L Offline
          Larry
          wrote on 15 May 2022, 15:22 last edited by
          #651

          So....

          Why does the Russian Navy have glass bottom boats?...

          So they can see their Air Force....

          I 1 Reply Last reply 16 May 2022, 03:32
          • L Larry
            15 May 2022, 15:22

            So....

            Why does the Russian Navy have glass bottom boats?...

            So they can see their Air Force....

            I Offline
            I Offline
            Ivorythumper
            wrote on 16 May 2022, 03:32 last edited by
            #652

            @Larry said in So....:

            So....

            Why does the Russian Navy have glass bottom boats?...

            So they can see their Air Force Navy....

            FIFYNNTTM

            1 Reply Last reply
            • G Offline
              G Offline
              George K
              wrote on 21 May 2022, 13:42 last edited by
              #653

              If Elon Musk came out as gay, would you oppose Musk man dates?

              "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

              The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

              1 Reply Last reply
              • J Online
                J Online
                jon-nyc
                wrote on 24 May 2022, 17:00 last edited by
                #654

                I always close my eyes when I kiss a woman.

                In my experience you get far less pepper spray in them that way.

                You were warned.

                1 Reply Last reply
                • J Online
                  J Online
                  jon-nyc
                  wrote on 24 May 2022, 22:56 last edited by
                  #655

                  I met my girlfriend on tinder.

                  Man that was awkward.

                  You were warned.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  • L Offline
                    L Offline
                    LuFins Dad
                    wrote on 24 May 2022, 23:21 last edited by
                    #656

                    I’ve started seeing a girl… Fortunately, she hasn’t seen me, yet.

                    The Brad

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • C Offline
                      C Offline
                      Catseye3
                      wrote on 26 May 2022, 12:36 last edited by
                      #657

                      Q. Why is the sand wet?
                      A. Because the sea weed.

                      Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

                      I 1 Reply Last reply 26 May 2022, 19:44
                      • C Offline
                        C Offline
                        Catseye3
                        wrote on 26 May 2022, 13:08 last edited by
                        #658

                        "How am I supposed to trust you when you keep running away every time I untie you?"

                        Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        • L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Larry
                          wrote on 26 May 2022, 14:58 last edited by
                          #659

                          So....

                          The sexual position known as 69 will henceforth be known as 96 as the cost of eating out has gone up...

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • C Catseye3
                            26 May 2022, 12:36

                            Q. Why is the sand wet?
                            A. Because the sea weed.

                            I Offline
                            I Offline
                            Ivorythumper
                            wrote on 26 May 2022, 19:44 last edited by
                            #660

                            @Catseye3 said in So....:

                            Q. Why is the sand wet?
                            A. Because the sea weed.

                            HAHA!

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            • G Offline
                              G Offline
                              George K
                              wrote on 29 May 2022, 21:30 last edited by
                              #661

                              The elderly wife in church turned to her husband and said, “I’ve just done a silent fart. What should I do?”

                              He said, “Change the batteries in your hearing aid”.

                              "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                              The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              • G Offline
                                G Offline
                                George K
                                wrote on 31 May 2022, 14:17 last edited by
                                #662

                                What pronouns does chocolate use?

                                Her/she.

                                "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                • J Online
                                  J Online
                                  jon-nyc
                                  wrote on 1 Jun 2022, 19:23 last edited by
                                  #663

                                  So.. I asked my grandfather how, after 70 years of marriage, why he still calls grandma "sweetie" or "love" or "gorgeous"....

                                  He replied, "I forgot her name years ago and there's no way I could ask."

                                  You were warned.

                                  B 1 Reply Last reply 2 Jun 2022, 01:18
                                  • J jon-nyc
                                    1 Jun 2022, 19:23

                                    So.. I asked my grandfather how, after 70 years of marriage, why he still calls grandma "sweetie" or "love" or "gorgeous"....

                                    He replied, "I forgot her name years ago and there's no way I could ask."

                                    B Offline
                                    B Offline
                                    brenda
                                    wrote on 2 Jun 2022, 01:18 last edited by
                                    #664

                                    @jon-nyc said in So....:

                                    So.. I asked my grandfather how, after 70 years of marriage, why he still calls grandma "sweetie" or "love" or "gorgeous"....

                                    He replied, "I forgot her name years ago and there's no way I could ask."

                                    Hubby loves this one! Very appropriate for us today, too. Thanks, Jon!

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • J Online
                                      J Online
                                      jon-nyc
                                      wrote on 4 Jun 2022, 01:31 last edited by
                                      #665

                                      I found a hat with $17.50 in it.

                                      At first I thought this other guy was going to pick it up. But he was too busy juggling.

                                      You were warned.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • G Offline
                                        G Offline
                                        George K
                                        wrote on 5 Jun 2022, 11:52 last edited by
                                        #666

                                        I put a banana down my pants to attract the ladies at the bar.

                                        Didn't work.

                                        Tonight I will put it in the front.

                                        "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                        The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                        B 1 Reply Last reply 6 Jun 2022, 14:03
                                        • G George K
                                          5 Jun 2022, 11:52

                                          I put a banana down my pants to attract the ladies at the bar.

                                          Didn't work.

                                          Tonight I will put it in the front.

                                          B Offline
                                          B Offline
                                          brenda
                                          wrote on 6 Jun 2022, 14:03 last edited by
                                          #667

                                          @George-K said in So....:

                                          I put a banana down my pants to attract the ladies at the bar.

                                          Didn't work.

                                          Tonight I will put it in the front.

                                          That's a version of the old joke about Sven and Ole going to the beach to get some girls. Ole asks Sven how it is that Sven gets all the girls' attention. Sven says, "Oh, ja, vell dat's cuz I put a potato in my svim trunks, doncha know."

                                          Ole is impressed with Sven's ingenuity, so he tries it the next day at the beach. To his dismay, it doesn't work at all. In fact, the girls like him even less than before.

                                          Ole asks Sven how it is that the potato trick didn't work for him. Sven replies, "Ya put it in da front, Ole! In da front!"

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                                          26 May 2022, 12:36


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