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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. So....

So....

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved General Discussion
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  • J Online
    J Online
    jon-nyc
    wrote on 9 May 2022, 22:12 last edited by
    #647

    The longest drum solo in history lasted 10 hours and 43 minutes.

    It was performed by the kid sitting behind me on Delta 237 from LA to Tokyo.

    Only non-witches get due process.

    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
    1 Reply Last reply
    • J jon-nyc
      8 May 2022, 13:37

      My buddy was bragging that his 3D printer could print a gun. But I wasn’t impressed.

      I’ve had a Canon printer for years.

      G Offline
      G Offline
      George K
      wrote on 9 May 2022, 22:16 last edited by
      #648

      @jon-nyc said in So....:

      My buddy was bragging that his 3D printer could print a gun. But I wasn’t impressed.

      I’ve had a Canon printer for years.

      Stealing....

      The longest drum solo in history lasted 10 hours and 43 minutes.

      It was performed by the kid sitting behind me on Delta 237 from LA to Tokyo.

      Yeah, that one too.

      "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

      The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

      1 Reply Last reply
      • J Online
        J Online
        jon-nyc
        wrote on 13 May 2022, 09:56 last edited by
        #649

        I just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick an ice cube up off the kitchen floor.

        Only non-witches get due process.

        • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
        1 Reply Last reply
        • J Online
          J Online
          jon-nyc
          wrote on 14 May 2022, 21:15 last edited by
          #650

          Anybody can masturbate under a sheet.

          But it takes real skill to do it without the hairdresser noticing.

          Only non-witches get due process.

          • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
          1 Reply Last reply
          • L Offline
            L Offline
            Larry
            wrote on 15 May 2022, 15:22 last edited by
            #651

            So....

            Why does the Russian Navy have glass bottom boats?...

            So they can see their Air Force....

            I 1 Reply Last reply 16 May 2022, 03:32
            • L Larry
              15 May 2022, 15:22

              So....

              Why does the Russian Navy have glass bottom boats?...

              So they can see their Air Force....

              I Offline
              I Offline
              Ivorythumper
              wrote on 16 May 2022, 03:32 last edited by
              #652

              @Larry said in So....:

              So....

              Why does the Russian Navy have glass bottom boats?...

              So they can see their Air Force Navy....

              FIFYNNTTM

              1 Reply Last reply
              • G Offline
                G Offline
                George K
                wrote on 21 May 2022, 13:42 last edited by
                #653

                If Elon Musk came out as gay, would you oppose Musk man dates?

                "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                1 Reply Last reply
                • J Online
                  J Online
                  jon-nyc
                  wrote on 24 May 2022, 17:00 last edited by
                  #654

                  I always close my eyes when I kiss a woman.

                  In my experience you get far less pepper spray in them that way.

                  Only non-witches get due process.

                  • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                  1 Reply Last reply
                  • J Online
                    J Online
                    jon-nyc
                    wrote on 24 May 2022, 22:56 last edited by
                    #655

                    I met my girlfriend on tinder.

                    Man that was awkward.

                    Only non-witches get due process.

                    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • L Offline
                      L Offline
                      LuFins Dad
                      wrote on 24 May 2022, 23:21 last edited by
                      #656

                      I’ve started seeing a girl… Fortunately, she hasn’t seen me, yet.

                      The Brad

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      • C Offline
                        C Offline
                        Catseye3
                        wrote on 26 May 2022, 12:36 last edited by
                        #657

                        Q. Why is the sand wet?
                        A. Because the sea weed.

                        Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

                        I 1 Reply Last reply 26 May 2022, 19:44
                        • C Offline
                          C Offline
                          Catseye3
                          wrote on 26 May 2022, 13:08 last edited by
                          #658

                          "How am I supposed to trust you when you keep running away every time I untie you?"

                          Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • L Offline
                            L Offline
                            Larry
                            wrote on 26 May 2022, 14:58 last edited by
                            #659

                            So....

                            The sexual position known as 69 will henceforth be known as 96 as the cost of eating out has gone up...

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            • C Catseye3
                              26 May 2022, 12:36

                              Q. Why is the sand wet?
                              A. Because the sea weed.

                              I Offline
                              I Offline
                              Ivorythumper
                              wrote on 26 May 2022, 19:44 last edited by
                              #660

                              @Catseye3 said in So....:

                              Q. Why is the sand wet?
                              A. Because the sea weed.

                              HAHA!

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              • G Offline
                                G Offline
                                George K
                                wrote on 29 May 2022, 21:30 last edited by
                                #661

                                The elderly wife in church turned to her husband and said, “I’ve just done a silent fart. What should I do?”

                                He said, “Change the batteries in your hearing aid”.

                                "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                • G Offline
                                  G Offline
                                  George K
                                  wrote on 31 May 2022, 14:17 last edited by
                                  #662

                                  What pronouns does chocolate use?

                                  Her/she.

                                  "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                  The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  • J Online
                                    J Online
                                    jon-nyc
                                    wrote on 1 Jun 2022, 19:23 last edited by
                                    #663

                                    So.. I asked my grandfather how, after 70 years of marriage, why he still calls grandma "sweetie" or "love" or "gorgeous"....

                                    He replied, "I forgot her name years ago and there's no way I could ask."

                                    Only non-witches get due process.

                                    • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                    B 1 Reply Last reply 2 Jun 2022, 01:18
                                    • J jon-nyc
                                      1 Jun 2022, 19:23

                                      So.. I asked my grandfather how, after 70 years of marriage, why he still calls grandma "sweetie" or "love" or "gorgeous"....

                                      He replied, "I forgot her name years ago and there's no way I could ask."

                                      B Offline
                                      B Offline
                                      brenda
                                      wrote on 2 Jun 2022, 01:18 last edited by
                                      #664

                                      @jon-nyc said in So....:

                                      So.. I asked my grandfather how, after 70 years of marriage, why he still calls grandma "sweetie" or "love" or "gorgeous"....

                                      He replied, "I forgot her name years ago and there's no way I could ask."

                                      Hubby loves this one! Very appropriate for us today, too. Thanks, Jon!

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • J Online
                                        J Online
                                        jon-nyc
                                        wrote on 4 Jun 2022, 01:31 last edited by
                                        #665

                                        I found a hat with $17.50 in it.

                                        At first I thought this other guy was going to pick it up. But he was too busy juggling.

                                        Only non-witches get due process.

                                        • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        • G Offline
                                          G Offline
                                          George K
                                          wrote on 5 Jun 2022, 11:52 last edited by
                                          #666

                                          I put a banana down my pants to attract the ladies at the bar.

                                          Didn't work.

                                          Tonight I will put it in the front.

                                          "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                          The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                          B 1 Reply Last reply 6 Jun 2022, 14:03
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