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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread

The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread

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  • L LuFins Dad
    17 Jan 2022, 03:06

    @jon-nyc said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

    Hellen Keller walked into a bar...

    And a table. And a chair. And a wall....

    Why did Helen Keller’s dog jump off a cliff? You would too if your name was Mmmmpfhaaaagh.

    C Offline
    C Offline
    Catseye3
    wrote on 28 Jan 2022, 18:01 last edited by
    #360

    @lufins-dad said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

    You would too if your name was Mmmmpfhaaaagh.

    ROFL.

    Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

    1 Reply Last reply
    • J Online
      J Online
      jon-nyc
      wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 01:59 last edited by
      #361

      I lost my virginity with a girl with Down’s syndrome.

      My mom always told me it should be with someone special.

      Only non-witches get due process.

      • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
      L 1 Reply Last reply 29 Jan 2022, 14:29
      • J Online
        J Online
        jon-nyc
        wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 02:01 last edited by
        #362

        What’s the difference between a Saudi Arabian elementary school and a Taliban outpost?

        I don’t know, I just fly the drone.

        Only non-witches get due process.

        • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
        G 1 Reply Last reply 29 Jan 2022, 02:28
        • J Online
          J Online
          jon-nyc
          wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 02:02 last edited by
          #363

          What’s the best thing about having Alzheimer’s?

          You get to meet new people every day.

          Only non-witches get due process.

          • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
          1 Reply Last reply
          • J jon-nyc
            29 Jan 2022, 02:01

            What’s the difference between a Saudi Arabian elementary school and a Taliban outpost?

            I don’t know, I just fly the drone.

            G Offline
            G Offline
            George K
            wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 02:28 last edited by
            #364

            @jon-nyc said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

            What’s the difference between a Saudi Arabian elementary school and a Taliban outpost?

            I don’t know, I just fly the drone.

            😲

            "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

            The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

            1 Reply Last reply
            • G Offline
              G Offline
              George K
              wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 13:15 last edited by
              #365

              I FOUND IT!!!

              g spot.jpg

              "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

              The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

              I 1 Reply Last reply 29 Jan 2022, 14:57
              • G Offline
                G Offline
                George K
                wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 13:16 last edited by
                #366

                image.jpeg

                "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                1 Reply Last reply
                • J jon-nyc
                  29 Jan 2022, 01:59

                  I lost my virginity with a girl with Down’s syndrome.

                  My mom always told me it should be with someone special.

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Larry
                  wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 14:29 last edited by
                  #367

                  @jon-nyc said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

                  I lost my virginity with a girl with Down’s syndrome.

                  My mom always told me it should be with someone special.

                  This guy and his wife are getting ready to go to a dinner party, they're running late and the wife just can't make up her mind as to which dress to wear. She says "I'm so frazzled I don't know whether I'm coming or going.."

                  Her husband says "you must be going.., because when you're coming you look like a Downs Syndrome kid trying to whistle...,"

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  • G George K
                    29 Jan 2022, 13:15

                    I FOUND IT!!!

                    g spot.jpg

                    I Offline
                    I Offline
                    Improviso
                    wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 14:57 last edited by
                    #368

                    @george-k said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

                    I FOUND IT!!!

                    g spot.jpg

                    1vpl21.jpg

                    We have the freedom to choose our actions, but we do not get to choose our consequences.
                    Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run, there's still time to change the road you're on.

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • I Offline
                      I Offline
                      Ivorythumper
                      wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 21:41 last edited by
                      #369

                      I bought a gravy boat at a garage sale…. 5006A6A3-9B3F-45A2-A721-DFC8B805AA51.jpeg

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      • G Offline
                        G Offline
                        George K
                        wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 21:57 last edited by
                        #370

                        FKNMkg7X0AEFTT7.png

                        "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                        The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        • N Offline
                          N Offline
                          Nunatax
                          wrote on 29 Jan 2022, 22:25 last edited by
                          #371

                          0E624679-86A5-4661-9A78-DCA1FCE40B46.jpeg

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • G Offline
                            G Offline
                            George K
                            wrote on 31 Jan 2022, 02:09 last edited by
                            #372

                            272779111_10224350650946183_2130810536516583943_n.jpg

                            "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                            The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            • G Offline
                              G Offline
                              George K
                              wrote on 31 Jan 2022, 14:11 last edited by
                              #373

                              Jesus wasn’t nailed to the cross, they used a power drill on him.

                              He had the holes whirled in his hands.

                              "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                              The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                              J 1 Reply Last reply 31 Jan 2022, 14:12
                              • G George K
                                31 Jan 2022, 14:11

                                Jesus wasn’t nailed to the cross, they used a power drill on him.

                                He had the holes whirled in his hands.

                                J Online
                                J Online
                                jon-nyc
                                wrote on 31 Jan 2022, 14:12 last edited by
                                #374

                                @george-k

                                Jesus walks into a hotel, throws three nails on the front desk and asks, “can you guys put me up for the night?”

                                Only non-witches get due process.

                                • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
                                I 1 Reply Last reply 31 Jan 2022, 14:17
                                • J jon-nyc
                                  31 Jan 2022, 14:12

                                  @george-k

                                  Jesus walks into a hotel, throws three nails on the front desk and asks, “can you guys put me up for the night?”

                                  I Offline
                                  I Offline
                                  Improviso
                                  wrote on 31 Jan 2022, 14:17 last edited by Improviso
                                  #375

                                  @jon-nyc said in The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread:

                                  Jesus walks into a hotel, throws three nails on the front desk and asks, “can you guys put me up for the night?”

                                  buddy_christ.jpg

                                  We have the freedom to choose our actions, but we do not get to choose our consequences.
                                  Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run, there's still time to change the road you're on.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  • G Offline
                                    G Offline
                                    George K
                                    wrote on 31 Jan 2022, 14:50 last edited by
                                    #376

                                    What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

                                    You only need one nail to hang the picture up.

                                    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • L Offline
                                      L Offline
                                      LuFins Dad
                                      wrote on 31 Jan 2022, 16:13 last edited by
                                      #377

                                      Where did Christa McCauliffe spend her spring break?

                                      All over Florida.

                                      The Brad

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • L Offline
                                        L Offline
                                        LuFins Dad
                                        wrote on 31 Jan 2022, 19:55 last edited by LuFins Dad
                                        #378

                                        How many Astronauts can you fit in a Volkswagon Beetle?

                                        1. 2 in the front seat, 1 in the back, and 7 in the ashtray.

                                        The Brad

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        • L Offline
                                          L Offline
                                          LuFins Dad
                                          wrote on 31 Jan 2022, 19:57 last edited by
                                          #379

                                          What was the last thing to go through McCauliffe's mind before she died?

                                          The armrest of the seat in front of hers.

                                          The Brad

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