Unmarried, With Children
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I don't understand not dating her, but how much does being a single mom affect her (or any woman) as marriage material?
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I once dated a single mother. It was nothing serious, but the fact that she had a kid didn't bother me in the slightest.
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The whole shooting the video in a car thing points to this woman being some type of social media influencer. So her comments are going to be filled with cranks.
The Brad
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Only influencers film in cars?
“Cry havoc and let slip the DOGE of war!”
Those who cheered as J-6 American prisoners were locked in solitary for 18 months without trial, now suddenly fight tooth and nail for foreign terrorists’ "due process". — Buck Sexton
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Whether or not she's an influencer, the kind of people who typically respond to this kind of video probably aren't that representative of 'normality'.
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The whole shooting the video in a car thing points to this woman being some type of social media influencer. So her comments are going to be filled with cranks.
@LuFins-Dad said in Unmarried, With Children:
The whole shooting the video in a car thing points to this woman being some type of social media influencer. So her comments are going to be filled with cranks.
Yeah I don't know her, but she's a social media chick shouting in the public square and then getting offended when someone shouts back at her. In other words, "ZOMG can you believe someone would post this comment to my video on the INTERNET?"
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@Jolly said in Unmarried, With Children:
Only influencers film in cars?
Or want to be influencers. It’s a thing. Somebody noted that people are less likely to scroll past a post if they see you sitting in a car.
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Haven't been in the dating pool for nearly 30 years, but if I was... finding out she's one of those nitwits who makes those stupid unwatchable videos would be much more a turn off than having had a prior kid.
A forever bachelor (even when he tries not to) friend of mine has made the comment..."A kid or two from one prior, is no big deal. But once she has multiple baby-dads...that's a red flag. Seemed reasonable.
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Yes but that’s from a forever bachelor.
The idea of marrying the mom is a different story. My former girlfriend had two daughters. While I never seriously considered marrying her, what little thought I did give it revealed complication after complication. Even little differences about home life - her kids were allowed to eat in their rooms. I’ve never allowed that in my house and never grew up in an environment where that was ok. What do we do? It would be one thing if they were 4 but they were all teenagers. And then of course I was hardly excited about funding two additional college degrees.
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The question really is generational.
Unwed or divorced mothers were extremely rare in Jolly and @George-K single days.
They were extremely rare in Mik’s through Jon’s early years.
By my 20s-early 30s it was more common, maybe 15%. I dated several mothers (nobody’s on this forum… except… No, not going there) but none seriously. But not because they were mothers. In my generation, it was becoming even a point of pride that you would raise someone else’s kids. I think that attitude held in @89th and @Aqua-Letifer generation. But there has been a significant change over the last few years. There’s a surprising and frightening number of young men that don’t even want any significant relationship with a woman, childless or not. I think many are Timcast listeners. All are children of divorce…
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The question really is generational.
Unwed or divorced mothers were extremely rare in Jolly and @George-K single days.
They were extremely rare in Mik’s through Jon’s early years.
By my 20s-early 30s it was more common, maybe 15%. I dated several mothers (nobody’s on this forum… except… No, not going there) but none seriously. But not because they were mothers. In my generation, it was becoming even a point of pride that you would raise someone else’s kids. I think that attitude held in @89th and @Aqua-Letifer generation. But there has been a significant change over the last few years. There’s a surprising and frightening number of young men that don’t even want any significant relationship with a woman, childless or not. I think many are Timcast listeners. All are children of divorce…
@LuFins-Dad said in Unmarried, With Children:
But there has been a significant change over the last few years. There’s a surprising and frightening number of young men that don’t even want any significant relationship with a woman, childless or not.
There are many, many reasons for that.
- Online dating apps. Guys will date above and beneath themselves on the dating hierarchy. Women, on the other hand, only go across and up. And the guys at the top know this. So they sleep around and do whatever the hell they want because they know that short of incarceration, they'll always have a dozen women lined up no matter how their last relationship panned out. Sociopathy and narcissism is much more prevalent in this group. Which women clamor to date. Which makes them believe all men are scum etc. So in the off chance any woman is willing to give average dudes a go, it's after they've spent years chasing after narcissists and sociopaths who own Beamers. But most just give it up. Some change teams to feel less alone.
- Many women today are told by their media, their parents, their schools, their friends and their commercials that guys are either (a) Handmaid's Tale supervillains (and hey, look at what their dating app experience has told them) or (b) incompetent assclowns. They're not looking to share a life, they're looking to maintain their independence and not be lowered by some man. (Nothing wrong with those things—just that "me" without "us" lays no relationship foundation.)
- Guys today are told by their media, their parents, their schools and their commercials that the best mark upon the earth they can hope for is not engage in a noble pursuit, but support women in theirs. No one cares if they get left behind so long as they aren't holding women back like freaking always. Their getting left behind is good actually because then that paves the way for more women, historically marginalized, to thrive.
It's an absolute mess. Young couples who get and stay married are committing minor miracles.
