@Doctor-Phibes said in 5..6..7..8!:
If I'm honest, many of the most humiliating moments of my life have occurred on the dance floor. I have no wish to increase their number.
Then, my friend, contra is for you. By outside observers, nothing's lamer. So you're screwed before you even start. You're already at rock bottom.
(There's "I wear all black and listen to subversive music from the safety of my Toyota Corolla" IDGAF, and then there's "I do Appalachian line dancing on Friday nights in public" IDGAF. You tell me which one wins.)
Also, massive hippie community. If it's your thing, there are any number organic compounds available that can help put some pep in ya step.