The Redhead
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I think I have a talent. Over the years, if I'm around a young lady very much, say at work or at church, I'll sometimes tell my wife, That young lady will make some lucky man a great wife.
It's not stunning beauty, it's a package. It's intellect with some common sense, the ability to meet and talk to people of all ages, it's loyalty to friends and family. It's curiosity and a wish to better one's self. It's faith in a higher power. And it helps if they come from a stable family. They may be "daddy's little girl", but they don't think of themselves as princesses.
Over the years, young ladies I've noticed in this way, tend to have good marriages. I won't live to see the entire arc, but I'm hopeful about that "until death do us part" ending.
I've spoken about my little redhead teenager at church. Oh, she's very young (not but 14 or 15), but the traits are there. Not beautiful, but cute. She's not as awkward or as shy as most girls her age and she knows how to interact with adults. I know her school grades are good and she's starting to think about what education she wants to pursue after high school. Her faith is strong and I think her view of the world is sober. And she comes from a great family.
She's going to be a great catch. I hope she chooses well.
And then... There are so many young ladies out there whose lives are like a lost ball in tall grass. Not just the uncertainty of youth, but they seem like they don't like themselves. So many are on mood altering scrips and still seem overly flighty or at times depressed. They're searching for answers in places they'll never find them and their life expectations are unrealistic.
Sadly, many of the young men in their lives are immature and lost as to who or what they are.
Maybe my views aren't just mine alone...
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According to Evans, several trends are driving this global decline in coupling. Smartphones and social media may have narrowed many young people’s lives, pinning them to their couches and bedrooms. But they’ve also opened women’s minds to the possibility of professional and personal development. When men fail to support their dreams, relationships fail to flourish, and the sexes drift apart.
If I had to sum up this big messy story in a sentence, it would be this: Coupling is declining around the world, as women’s expectations rise and lower-income men’s fortunes fall; this combination is subverting the traditional role of straight marriage, in which men are seen as necessary for the economic insurance of their family.
Interesting article. To your personal point, that is great. It's hard when you're a teenager but being confident in who you are is so underrated. Without it, it's so easy to be molded by others into something you're not, or to be jealous of "perfect" lives of others, or constantly in self-doubt.
There are certainly an infinite number of reasons why relationships and/or marriage are so much different or delayed now. I think the main culprits are a combination of internet/social interaction mixed with the cultural shift in expectations for women and men. Perhaps relatedly, how expensive it is now for anything (college, house, kids) and the necessity for dual careers...which both delays marriage and kids, and also really, really strains marriages when someone (usually the woman) has to sacrifice her career identity, at least for a bit.
