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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. Children are a gift from God

Children are a gift from God

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  • JollyJ Offline
    JollyJ Offline
    Jolly
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    So, why aren't we having them?

    From The Atlantic... https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/other/the-real-reason-people-aren-t-having-kids/ar-BB1r1bvT

    I have a few ideas of my own, at least for the U.S.

    1. Secularism. While America has always prided itself on freedom of religion, we have morphed into a country obsessed with freedom from religion. Religion gives people hope for a better future and most promote having a family and children. Too much secularism promotes an atmosphere of selfishness.
    2. Ripping traditional marriage apart. Sorry, but I have no problem engaging in discrimination for societal good. For the vast majority of people, marriage makes for more productive, happier lives. And children. I think anything that weakens traditional marriage is detrimental for society.
    3. Childcare. It's hideously expensive. When our economy morphed to where it took two jobs to support a middle-class lifestyle, it also took the mother out of the home, especially when her children were small. Lots to discuss here...Should we be happier with smaller homes, one vehicle and less consumer goods, but find our happiness in our families like the parents of the 1950's? Do we provide a childcare net like the Nirdic countries? Do we overhaul tax policy? Do we have an answer at all?

    “Cry havoc and let slip the DOGE of war!”

    Those who cheered as J-6 American prisoners were locked in solitary for 18 months without trial, now suddenly fight tooth and nail for foreign terrorists’ "due process". — Buck Sexton

    1 Reply Last reply
    • MikM Away
      MikM Away
      Mik
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      AI might just fix #3. I doubt it, but if we're all put out of work...

      “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

      89th8 1 Reply Last reply
      • LuFins DadL Offline
        LuFins DadL Offline
        LuFins Dad
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Children are clumps of cells that act like parasites on their mothers’ bodies, even after birth. They are inconvenient, will make you be poor forever, but can be taken care of with a simple medical procedure. And hey, that way you can take on sex as a hobby with no responsibilities!

        The Brad

        Aqua LetiferA 1 Reply Last reply
        • LuFins DadL Offline
          LuFins DadL Offline
          LuFins Dad
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Cats are much better.

          The Brad

          George KG 1 Reply Last reply
          • LuFins DadL LuFins Dad

            Cats are much better.

            George KG Offline
            George KG Offline
            George K
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            @LuFins-Dad said in Children are a gift from God:

            Cats are much better.

            Cheaper and friendlier too.

            "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

            The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

            George KG 1 Reply Last reply
            • LuFins DadL LuFins Dad

              Children are clumps of cells that act like parasites on their mothers’ bodies, even after birth. They are inconvenient, will make you be poor forever, but can be taken care of with a simple medical procedure. And hey, that way you can take on sex as a hobby with no responsibilities!

              Aqua LetiferA Offline
              Aqua LetiferA Offline
              Aqua Letifer
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              @LuFins-Dad said in Children are a gift from God:

              Children are clumps of cells that act like parasites on their mothers’ bodies, even after birth. They are inconvenient, will make you be poor forever, but can be taken care of with a simple medical procedure. And hey, that way you can take on sex as a hobby with no responsibilities!

              I find it interesting that one of the big arguments against is "there go my hobbies," "my life would be over," etc.

              Not having kids makes it difficult to have your personal interests mean anything. It's not impossible, but it is a challenge.

              Please love yourself.

              1 Reply Last reply
              • MikM Away
                MikM Away
                Mik
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Indeed, Aqua. What makes life worthwhile is having something or someone more important than yourself.

                “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

                1 Reply Last reply
                • MikM Mik

                  AI might just fix #3. I doubt it, but if we're all put out of work...

                  89th8 Offline
                  89th8 Offline
                  89th
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  @Mik said in Children are a gift from God:

                  AI might just fix #3. I doubt it, but if we're all put out of work...

                  I'd imagine eventually the government will extend "school" all the way to include age 0 and therefore daycare (and later preschool) will become a taxpayer-funded service, similar to public school today. On one hand, that would decrease the cost to parents and increase the pay for daycare and preschool teachers, on the other hand it'll further increase public reliance on the government to do everything.

                  BTW I think in addition or to repeat what you all have said, I think there are fewer kids because:

                  A) It's expensive
                  B) People, namely women, are much more career focused (and/or require dual incomes) so people are waiting longer and longer to get married and then longer and longer to have their first kid, which makes having a 2nd or 3rd that much more unlikely

                  JollyJ 1 Reply Last reply
                  • 89th8 89th

                    @Mik said in Children are a gift from God:

                    AI might just fix #3. I doubt it, but if we're all put out of work...

                    I'd imagine eventually the government will extend "school" all the way to include age 0 and therefore daycare (and later preschool) will become a taxpayer-funded service, similar to public school today. On one hand, that would decrease the cost to parents and increase the pay for daycare and preschool teachers, on the other hand it'll further increase public reliance on the government to do everything.

                    BTW I think in addition or to repeat what you all have said, I think there are fewer kids because:

                    A) It's expensive
                    B) People, namely women, are much more career focused (and/or require dual incomes) so people are waiting longer and longer to get married and then longer and longer to have their first kid, which makes having a 2nd or 3rd that much more unlikely

                    JollyJ Offline
                    JollyJ Offline
                    Jolly
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    @89th said in Children are a gift from God:

                    @Mik said in Children are a gift from God:

                    AI might just fix #3. I doubt it, but if we're all put out of work...

                    I'd imagine eventually the government will extend "school" all the way to include age 0 and therefore daycare (and later preschool) will become a taxpayer-funded service, similar to public school today. On one hand, that would decrease the cost to parents and increase the pay for daycare and preschool teachers, on the other hand it'll further increase public reliance on the government to do everything.

                    BTW I think in addition or to repeat what you all have said, I think there are fewer kids because:

                    A) It's expensive
                    B) People, namely women, are much more career focused (and/or require dual incomes) so people are waiting longer and longer to get married and then longer and longer to have their first kid, which makes having a 2nd or 3rd that much more unlikely

                    Case-in-point... FOX personality Kat Timpf graduated from Hillsdale, then almost went to Columbia...

                    https://www.nationalreview.com/2019/04/we-should-be-advising-young-people-to-not-take-out-loans-they-cant-afford/

                    She couldn't afford it . She did odds and ends, wrote for multiple websites (NRO, Washington Times,etc.), did some radio work and eventually climbed the ladder at FOX News.

                    She didn't marry until she was in her thirties and now she is pregnant with their first child at 35. Depending on how her pregnancy (and career) goes, how many children will she have? Maybe just this one.

                    I think this is a pretty common story nowadays.

                    “Cry havoc and let slip the DOGE of war!”

                    Those who cheered as J-6 American prisoners were locked in solitary for 18 months without trial, now suddenly fight tooth and nail for foreign terrorists’ "due process". — Buck Sexton

                    Aqua LetiferA 1 Reply Last reply
                    • MikM Away
                      MikM Away
                      Mik
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      High paying jobs are not 9-5 anymore. More like 5-9.

                      “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      • JollyJ Jolly

                        @89th said in Children are a gift from God:

                        @Mik said in Children are a gift from God:

                        AI might just fix #3. I doubt it, but if we're all put out of work...

                        I'd imagine eventually the government will extend "school" all the way to include age 0 and therefore daycare (and later preschool) will become a taxpayer-funded service, similar to public school today. On one hand, that would decrease the cost to parents and increase the pay for daycare and preschool teachers, on the other hand it'll further increase public reliance on the government to do everything.

                        BTW I think in addition or to repeat what you all have said, I think there are fewer kids because:

                        A) It's expensive
                        B) People, namely women, are much more career focused (and/or require dual incomes) so people are waiting longer and longer to get married and then longer and longer to have their first kid, which makes having a 2nd or 3rd that much more unlikely

                        Case-in-point... FOX personality Kat Timpf graduated from Hillsdale, then almost went to Columbia...

                        https://www.nationalreview.com/2019/04/we-should-be-advising-young-people-to-not-take-out-loans-they-cant-afford/

                        She couldn't afford it . She did odds and ends, wrote for multiple websites (NRO, Washington Times,etc.), did some radio work and eventually climbed the ladder at FOX News.

                        She didn't marry until she was in her thirties and now she is pregnant with their first child at 35. Depending on how her pregnancy (and career) goes, how many children will she have? Maybe just this one.

                        I think this is a pretty common story nowadays.

                        Aqua LetiferA Offline
                        Aqua LetiferA Offline
                        Aqua Letifer
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        @Jolly said in Children are a gift from God:

                        @89th said in Children are a gift from God:

                        @Mik said in Children are a gift from God:

                        AI might just fix #3. I doubt it, but if we're all put out of work...

                        I'd imagine eventually the government will extend "school" all the way to include age 0 and therefore daycare (and later preschool) will become a taxpayer-funded service, similar to public school today. On one hand, that would decrease the cost to parents and increase the pay for daycare and preschool teachers, on the other hand it'll further increase public reliance on the government to do everything.

                        BTW I think in addition or to repeat what you all have said, I think there are fewer kids because:

                        A) It's expensive
                        B) People, namely women, are much more career focused (and/or require dual incomes) so people are waiting longer and longer to get married and then longer and longer to have their first kid, which makes having a 2nd or 3rd that much more unlikely

                        Case-in-point... FOX personality Kat Timpf graduated from Hillsdale, then almost went to Columbia...

                        https://www.nationalreview.com/2019/04/we-should-be-advising-young-people-to-not-take-out-loans-they-cant-afford/

                        She couldn't afford it . She did odds and ends, wrote for multiple websites (NRO, Washington Times,etc.), did some radio work and eventually climbed the ladder at FOX News.

                        She didn't marry until she was in her thirties and now she is pregnant with their first child at 35. Depending on how her pregnancy (and career) goes, how many children will she have? Maybe just this one.

                        I think this is a pretty common story nowadays.

                        More or less what my wife and I both did.

                        My parents like to spin a good yarn about how destitute they were starting out and "you don't know how good you have it." But they're looking at the quality of and affordability of televisions and microwaves, not modern employee expectations, housing, the job market, etc.

                        Please love yourself.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        • MikM Away
                          MikM Away
                          Mik
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          We were not as much a consumer society at that point. Until the 80's you might have a TV and a stereo. No microwaves, no computers, no smart phones, no VCRs, no McMansions.

                          “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • LuFins DadL Offline
                            LuFins DadL Offline
                            LuFins Dad
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Kids are inconvenient.

                            The Brad

                            JollyJ 1 Reply Last reply
                            • LuFins DadL LuFins Dad

                              Kids are inconvenient.

                              JollyJ Offline
                              JollyJ Offline
                              Jolly
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              @LuFins-Dad said in Children are a gift from God:

                              Kids are inconvenient.

                              Not to Planned Parenthood.

                              “Cry havoc and let slip the DOGE of war!”

                              Those who cheered as J-6 American prisoners were locked in solitary for 18 months without trial, now suddenly fight tooth and nail for foreign terrorists’ "due process". — Buck Sexton

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              • George KG George K

                                @LuFins-Dad said in Children are a gift from God:

                                Cats are much better.

                                Cheaper and friendlier too.

                                George KG Offline
                                George KG Offline
                                George K
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                @George-K said in Children are a gift from God:

                                @LuFins-Dad said in Children are a gift from God:
                                Cats are much better.

                                Cheaper and friendlier too.

                                "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                • B Offline
                                  B Offline
                                  blondie
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  Gotta be willing to put a child’s needs before your own. Having kids is very expensive.
                                  Just speculating, but parent generations now might be experiencing a generation of grandparents who are too old to help raise the grandkids. They also have fewer siblings to help out as aunties or uncles.

                                  George KG 1 Reply Last reply
                                  • B blondie

                                    Gotta be willing to put a child’s needs before your own. Having kids is very expensive.
                                    Just speculating, but parent generations now might be experiencing a generation of grandparents who are too old to help raise the grandkids. They also have fewer siblings to help out as aunties or uncles.

                                    George KG Offline
                                    George KG Offline
                                    George K
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    @blondie said in Children are a gift from God:

                                    a generation of grandparents who are too old to help raise the grandkids

                                    G2 is 6, G3 is 2. Mrs. George and I are 74.

                                    Three hours with them is exhausting.

                                    That said, I was, for the most part, raised by my grandmother - both parents worked. I went to college when she was 71.

                                    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • B Offline
                                      B Offline
                                      blondie
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      Talking to some millennials in my city, they shout loudly they compete to get 600 sq ft rental units, stress over rent increases, don’t have vehicles, commute at all hours on a crappy transit system and/or do remote work from their bedrooms, struggle to find primary careers and their 2nd side jobs, then work just to be downsized/laid off. They are stressed and depressed. Many don’t date or socialize and say they can’t afford to (money & time wise). I get the feeling they have declining hope for their futures. I don’t hear any of them ponder having kids. Some dream of owning a condo but say it’s impossible. They are stuck in now mode and aren’t too future positive. They blame boomers, corporate greed, the government.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • B Offline
                                        B Offline
                                        blondie
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #19

                                        @George-K I couldn’t handle being a grandparent. I can’t do it.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        • JollyJ Offline
                                          JollyJ Offline
                                          Jolly
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #20

                                          I enjoy mine. I kept my six year-old grandson today.

                                          “Cry havoc and let slip the DOGE of war!”

                                          Those who cheered as J-6 American prisoners were locked in solitary for 18 months without trial, now suddenly fight tooth and nail for foreign terrorists’ "due process". — Buck Sexton

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