The Dark or Inappropriate Humor Thread
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It’s always something.
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Padma: “Come on over, the kids aren’t home”
Anakin: “I know.”
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A Navy ship at sea.
The troops are mustered on deck. The deck officer announces, "Now hear this. Ensign Johnson, your mother died."
The captain was furious. "That was a terrible way to handle such a thing! If this ever happens again, I want to see a lot more sensitivity, mister!"
Months pass. The troops are again in formation. The deck officer: "All personnel whose mothers have not died take one step forward -- not so fast, Seaman Grabowski!"
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What was the last thing to cross Christa McCauliffe’s mind before she died?
The control panel.
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I would have said gametes but still...
It’s always something.
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@jon-nyc said in The Dark and Inappropriate Humor Thread:
I would have said gametes but still...
He was a Psychiatrist and a Pediatrician. Isn’t that wonderful?
Just about every seriously messed up person I know majored in Psychiatry.
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Two wives go for a girls’ night out, both get drunk, start walking home but have to pee.
They stop at a cemetery, but there’s nothing to wipe with, so one uses her panties, the other grabs a wreath off a grave!
Next morning one husband calls the other and says “No more girls’ nights out, my wife came back with no panties."
The other husband says “You think that’s bad, mine came back with a card in her crack that read ‘From all of us at the Fire Station, we’ll never forget you’ " -
Ha - I posted that the other day in the 'So' thread.
We probably got it from the same viral audio feed.
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Reminds me of the documentary I watched recently called "Time". A black man and wife, the wife apparently pregnant with twins, attempted an armed robbery of a bank. It was never described. The woman accepted a plea deal and got out in 4 years. The man did not accept the deal and was sentenced to 60 years. The woman is very intelligent, is a slam poetry type. She spent most of the documentary doing slam poetry about the bigotry of the system, which she not only analogized with slavery, but actually identified with it. She's a prison abolitionist. She made at least one really smart kid. She made some others while her husband was in prison doing his "time", which was never explained in the documentary. Eventually he was granted clemency after 20 years, again which was never explained. He got out and he and his wife had sex in the limo on the way from the jail. She rented a limo. The documentary got 98% positive from Rotten Tomatoes critics, and 44% from audience critics. This is because racism, of course. Also the executive producers of the film included the Steve Jobs billionaire heiress and one other prominent white heir. So much guilt, so little money.
The amazon reviews (not the critic reviews) were interesting to read. I only watched it because it was recommended by someone I (previously) trusted.
