Post your Libertarian jokes here

[jon-nyc]

"If you libertarians had your way, people would be having sex in public parks."

"Not true. Those parks would never be public."

[George K]

A liberal, a conservative and a libertarian walk in to a bar.

Bartender says, what'll ya have Mitt?

[Doctor Phibes]

[Axtremus]

What is the tallest building in the world?
The library, because it has the most stories.

What do you call a South American librarian who is always in a hurry?
Urgent Tina.

Why did the librarian win a Lifetime Achievement Award?
She had a storied career.

What section of the library can you get biten by a snake?
Hissssssstory.

Whose the biggest liar in school?
The Lie-brarian.

What did the librarian say to John Cusack?
Shhhhh! Don't Say Anything.

What did the librarian say to the astronaut?
Find space for a book.

[Doctor Phibes]

I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned.

[Larry]

@Axtremus said in Post your Libertarian jokes here:

What is the tallest building in the world?
The library, because it has the most stories.

What do you call a South American librarian who is always in a hurry?
Urgent Tina.

Why did the librarian win a Lifetime Achievement Award?
She had a storied career.

What section of the library can you get biten by a snake?
Hissssssstory.

Whose the biggest liar in school?
The Lie-brarian.

What did the librarian say to John Cusack?
Shhhhh! Don't Say Anything.

What did the librarian say to the astronaut?
Find space for a book.

LIBERTARIAN, Ax. Not LIBRARIAN...

LIBERTARIAN........

Baaaahahahahaaaaaa

[George K]

@Doctor-Phibes stealing that one....

[LuFins Dad]

Q: A Libertarian, a Vegan, and a Cyclist walk into a bar. How do you tell which is which?

A: Don't worry, they'll fucking tell you.

[Larry]

Why did the LIBERTARIAN cross the road?
.
.
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None of your damned business! ... Am I being detained?.....

[Larry]

I had a LIBERTARIAN salad for lunch ...

Lettuce alone!!!

[Larry]

What's the difference between a LIBERTARIAN wedding and a LIBERTARIAN funeral?
.
.
.
One less opinion...

[Larry]

Piźa boy arrives at a LIBERTARIAN meeting:

Knock knock...
.
.
.
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GOT A WARRANT?

[Larry]

Jesus Christ is in a restaurant having dinner.

A Republican comes in, sits down at a table. When the waitress comes over the Republican asks "isn't that Jesus over there?" The waitress says "yes". The Republican says " please take him a cup of coffee and charge it to me."

A Libertarian comes in and sits at another table. When the waitress comes over the Libertarian asks "Isn't that Jesus sitting over there?" The waitress says "yes". The Libertarian says "please take him a glass of tea and put it on my bill."

A Democrat comes in and sits at a table. When the waitress comes over the Democrat asks "is that Jesus over there?" The waitress says "yes." The democrat looks around the room to see how many people are in the room, then in a loud voice says "TAKE JESUS A BEER AND PUT THE CHARGE ON MY BILL!"

A little later Jesus gets up to leave. As he passes the Republican he puts his hand on his shoulder and says "for your act of kindness, you have been healed." Instantly the pain in his legs was gone and the Republican stood up and danced for joy.

Jesus walks over to the libertarian, puts his hand on the libertarians shoulder and says "for your act of kindness, you have been healed." Immediately the pain in his back was gone, and he stood up and danced for joy.

As Jesus walks toward the Democrat, the Democrat jumps up ready to run and says "DONT TOUCH ME!! I'm on disability!!"

[George K]

[Doctor Phibes]

Why was Milo Yiannopoulos kicked out of the Libertarian Party?

He slowed down in a school zone.

[Loki]

@George-K said in Post your Libertarian jokes here:

That’s hilarious.

[jon-nyc]

Those are both hilarious