How much skin should your kid have in the game?
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@aqua-letifer said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
@lufins-dad said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
I was thinking 50/50, but as we get closer I start to feel protective and don't want to see him in major debt coming out of school. What are your thoughts?
Maybe, do what you can, he does what he can, have loans cover the rest?
That kind of reasoning results in your kid spending an assload of money getting a “degree” from New Zealand or something...
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@aqua-letifer said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
@lufins-dad said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
I was thinking 50/50, but as we get closer I start to feel protective and don't want to see him in major debt coming out of school. What are your thoughts?
Maybe, do what you can, he does what he can, have loans cover the rest?
That kind of reasoning results in your kid spending an assload of money getting a “degree” from New Zealand or something...
@lufins-dad said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
That kind of reasoning results in your kid spending an assload of money getting a “degree” from New Zealand or something...
One quarter of an assload, thankyouverymuch.
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Luke is an Eagle scout is he not? That would indicate to me that skin in the game will not be a big issue.
What I would look at is what can you cover without seriously impacting building your own financial security. If you can send him into the world debt free, that’s great. If not, try to keep the debt down as much as possible.
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Its like the tell you on the plane - put your oxygen mask on before trying to help someone else.
As harsh as it may feel, parents do not owe their children an all expenses paid education. If you can, great. If not, help as much as you can.
I agree with Jon...discuss the relative situations thoroughly with him, including what he can expect to make after graduation and how that debt will impact it.
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Not commenting on "affordability" and simply assuming that "affordability" is not an issue for you, then I'd say you just go ahead and pay for everything higher-ed. Reasons are two:
- You have had 16 or 17 years to teach your kid responsibility; maybe have a little faith in both of you in believing that you have taught it well and he has learnt it well.
- Most bachelor's degrees these days as a competitive currency is about the same as a high school diploma from one or two generations ago; so you're really paying for it like someone else paid for high school one or two generations ago. Maybe let him pay for it himself when he goes for a Master's or Doctorate degree.
In any case, congratulations on him getting accepted into one of his preferred schools, and good luck to you both.
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One option is to let them have (apparent) skin in the game but pay the debts for them when they leave. So they get the full incentive effect without the debt.
@jon-nyc said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
One option is to let them have (apparent) skin in the game but pay the debts for them when they leave. So they get the full incentive effect without the debt.
I like this idea too.
You could also have it based on GPA. Although that could spiral badly if he has a tough start.
Maybe just require he have a job while he’s there to use for disposable income? Or at least during the summers.
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We said we'd pay off the interest but he had to pay off the principal
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Not commenting on "affordability" and simply assuming that "affordability" is not an issue for you, then I'd say you just go ahead and pay for everything higher-ed. Reasons are two:
- You have had 16 or 17 years to teach your kid responsibility; maybe have a little faith in both of you in believing that you have taught it well and he has learnt it well.
- Most bachelor's degrees these days as a competitive currency is about the same as a high school diploma from one or two generations ago; so you're really paying for it like someone else paid for high school one or two generations ago. Maybe let him pay for it himself when he goes for a Master's or Doctorate degree.
In any case, congratulations on him getting accepted into one of his preferred schools, and good luck to you both.
@axtremus said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
Not commenting on "affordability" and simply assuming that "affordability" is not an issue for you, then I'd say you just go ahead and pay for everything higher-ed. Reasons are two:
- You have had 16 or 17 years to teach your kid responsibility; maybe have a little faith in both of you in believing that you have taught it well and he has learnt it well.
- Most bachelor's degrees these days as a competitive currency is about the same as a high school diploma from one or two generations ago; so you're really paying for it like someone else paid for high school one or two generations ago. Maybe let him pay for it himself when he goes for a Master's or Doctorate degree.
This is my thinking as well. Daughter #2 is currently a sophomore.
We cover all the necessities; anything "extra" she has to pay for. We knew before we had children that we would do it this way, so we sort of prepared for it. -
@klaus generally the countries which make you pay for ambulance service also charge a tuition for education that requires you go deeply into debt.
There must be some correlation there though I’m not sure it’s obvious.
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@klaus generally the countries which make you pay for ambulance service also charge a tuition for education that requires you go deeply into debt.
There must be some correlation there though I’m not sure it’s obvious.
@bachophile said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
@klaus generally the countries which make you pay for ambulance service also charge a tuition for education that requires you go deeply into debt.
There must be some correlation there though I’m not sure it’s obvious.
Actually, I'm even in favor of letting students pay some tuition. The "completely free" model we have over here is not optimal for creating the right incentives. My feeling is that something like $3000 or $5000 per year would be optimal. But those $60K/year things in the US is just insane.
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I told my daughter that it is coming out of her inheritance.
That's what I tell her whenever we pick up a tab.
@copper said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
I told my daughter that it is coming out of her inheritance.
That's what I tell her whenever we pick up a tab.
Our approach has been that education is the core of the inheritance, that’s a great foundation for for what constitutes a family “brand” or value system.
Personally I think if you think your legacy is to be remembered by giving after you die, it’s very risky. Your legacy is what you do when you are alive. Of course the balance for me at least is to try to have your children be self sustaining individuals.
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@klaus generally the countries which make you pay for ambulance service also charge a tuition for education that requires you go deeply into debt.
There must be some correlation there though I’m not sure it’s obvious.
@bachophile said in How much skin should your kid have in the game?:
@klaus generally the countries which make you pay for ambulance service also charge a tuition for education that requires you go deeply into debt.
There must be some correlation there though I’m not sure it’s obvious.
You maybe on to something there. Even here ambulance transport is not covered by the provincial health insurance for anyone under 65 years of age. You either have private supplemental health insurance to cover ambulance or pay out of pocket. Once you are 65 the ambulance is covered by an old age provincial supplemental health insurance entitlement through Blue Cross.
We also charge tuition for all post secondary education.
Hmmmmm
