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The New Coffee Room

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  3. Midlife Crisis Man

Midlife Crisis Man

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  • Aqua LetiferA Offline
    Aqua LetiferA Offline
    Aqua Letifer
    wrote on last edited by Aqua Letifer
    #1

    (Written during a family drive to the store.)

    There's a man whose hairline is endangered
    His youthfulness and waistline is a stranger
    With every move, he aches
    He's often called a flake
    Odds are that he'll buy a boat tomorrow

    Midlife crisis man
    Midlife crisis man
    Your age is just a number, and it's never what you claim

    With Rogaine and a spray-on tan he'll find
    His dad jokes are as flat as his behind
    Will they notice his toupee?
    Are his nosehairs turning grey?
    Odds are that he'll hit the gym tomorrow.

    Midlife crisis man
    Midlife crisis man
    Your age is just a number, and it's never what you claim

    Putzing through the Wal-Mart checkout one day
    And then cruising import dealerships the next day
    Oh he'll be driving Sunset Strip
    With bad eyes and busted hips
    Odds are that he'll take a nap tomorrow

    Midlife crisis man
    Midlife crisis man
    Your age is just a number, and it's never what you claim

    Please love yourself.

    1 Reply Last reply
    • JollyJ Offline
      JollyJ Offline
      Jolly
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      Some of the best things are simply sperm of the moment.

      “Cry havoc and let slip the DOGE of war!”

      Those who cheered as J-6 American prisoners were locked in solitary for 18 months without trial, now suddenly fight tooth and nail for foreign terrorists’ "due process". — Buck Sexton

      Aqua LetiferA 1 Reply Last reply
      • JollyJ Jolly

        Some of the best things are simply sperm of the moment.

        Aqua LetiferA Offline
        Aqua LetiferA Offline
        Aqua Letifer
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        @Jolly said in Midlife Crisis Man:

        Some of the best things are simply sperm of the moment.

        😄 Never know when you're gonna bang one out.

        Please love yourself.

        1 Reply Last reply
        • jon-nycJ Online
          jon-nycJ Online
          jon-nyc
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Lol x3 guys

          Only non-witches get due process.

          • Cotton Mather, Salem Massachusetts, 1692
          1 Reply Last reply
          • brendaB Offline
            brendaB Offline
            brenda
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            Secret Agent Man!

            1 Reply Last reply
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