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A place for jokes and silliness.
I wanted to start a diet, but I feel like I have way too much on my plate right now.
What do you call a mean potato?
A dictator.
Teacher: "Leroy, please make a sentence using the word 'dictate ".
Leroy: "I took Quahita on a date and afterwards I said 'Quahita, how my dictate?' "
So, if Hooters starts delivering food, will it have to change its name to Knockers?
Steve Jobs would have made a better President than Trump...
...but that's comparing apples to oranges.
@xenon said in So....:
Steve Jobs would have made a better President than Trump... ...but that's comparing apples to oranges.
That's so bad it's good! LOL
I just heard something suspicious outside and caught some asshole siphoning gas into my car.
@jon-nyc lol
So... I feel like I'm 16 again...
Gas is cheap.. I can't get into a bar or drink.. And I'm grounded...
So.. the Catholic church just released a new aftershave...
Eau My God.....
So.. my grandfather was in the army until he ate all the rations...
He was shot for desserting ...
Did you know that when you say the word "poop" your mouth moves the same way your butthole moves?
The same goes for "explosive diahrrea"....
If after the lockdown you were given 2 options:
Fly with your wife to a dream destination or have a BBQ with the guys, what would you choose?
So.. in this difficult time we should all endeavor to lend a helping hand to others when we can. Just today I helped my neighbor bury a large rug in the woods behind her house.
Her husband would have helped, but he's out of town.....
My wife said she's leaving me because she's sick and tired of my "weird sexual fetishes"..
So I said "oh yeah? Well just slam the door on my pecker when you leave!!"
