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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. So....

So....

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved General Discussion
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  • L Offline
    L Offline
    Larry
    wrote on 5 Apr 2020, 02:57 last edited by
    #4

    Teacher: "Leroy, please make a sentence using the word 'dictate ".

    Leroy: "I took Quahita on a date and afterwards I said 'Quahita, how my dictate?' "

    1 Reply Last reply
    • G Offline
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      George K
      wrote on 8 Apr 2020, 12:08 last edited by
      #5

      So, if Hooters starts delivering food, will it have to change its name to Knockers?

      "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

      The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

      1 Reply Last reply
      • I Offline
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        Improviso
        wrote on 8 Apr 2020, 12:12 last edited by
        #6

        92681644_2577534305836522_1770070367595921408_n.jpg

        We have the freedom to choose our actions, but we do not get to choose our consequences.
        Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run, there's still time to change the road you're on.

        1 Reply Last reply
        • I Offline
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          Improviso
          wrote on 8 Apr 2020, 12:20 last edited by
          #7

          92583220_3341627545870131_1624729722271301632_n.jpg

          We have the freedom to choose our actions, but we do not get to choose our consequences.
          Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run, there's still time to change the road you're on.

          1 Reply Last reply
          • X Offline
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            xenon
            wrote on 16 Apr 2020, 21:07 last edited by xenon
            #8

            Steve Jobs would have made a better President than Trump...

            ...but that's comparing apples to oranges.

            G B 2 Replies Last reply 16 Apr 2020, 21:21
            • X xenon
              16 Apr 2020, 21:07

              Steve Jobs would have made a better President than Trump...

              ...but that's comparing apples to oranges.

              G Offline
              G Offline
              George K
              wrote on 16 Apr 2020, 21:21 last edited by
              #9

              @xenon said in So....:

              Steve Jobs would have made a better President than Trump...

              ...but that's comparing apples to oranges.

              😆

              "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

              The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

              1 Reply Last reply
              • X xenon
                16 Apr 2020, 21:07

                Steve Jobs would have made a better President than Trump...

                ...but that's comparing apples to oranges.

                B Offline
                B Offline
                brenda
                wrote on 16 Apr 2020, 23:36 last edited by
                #10

                @xenon said in So....:

                Steve Jobs would have made a better President than Trump...

                ...but that's comparing apples to oranges.

                That's so bad it's good! LOL

                1 Reply Last reply
                • J Offline
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                  jon-nyc
                  wrote on 21 Apr 2020, 21:26 last edited by
                  #11

                  I just heard something suspicious outside and caught some asshole siphoning gas into my car.

                  You were warned.

                  M 1 Reply Last reply 21 Apr 2020, 21:33
                  • J jon-nyc
                    21 Apr 2020, 21:26

                    I just heard something suspicious outside and caught some asshole siphoning gas into my car.

                    M Offline
                    M Offline
                    mark
                    wrote on 21 Apr 2020, 21:33 last edited by
                    #12

                    @jon-nyc lol

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • L Offline
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                      Larry
                      wrote on 28 Apr 2020, 00:43 last edited by
                      #13

                      att00012.jpg

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      • L Offline
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                        Larry
                        wrote on 28 Apr 2020, 14:18 last edited by
                        #14

                        So... I feel like I'm 16 again...

                        Gas is cheap..
                        I can't get into a bar or drink..
                        And I'm grounded...

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        • L Offline
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                          Larry
                          wrote on 28 Apr 2020, 14:27 last edited by
                          #15

                          So.. the Catholic church just released a new aftershave...

                          Eau My God.....

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • L Offline
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                            Larry
                            wrote on 28 Apr 2020, 14:28 last edited by
                            #16

                            So.. my grandfather was in the army until he ate all the rations...

                            He was shot for desserting ...

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            • L Offline
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                              Larry
                              wrote on 28 Apr 2020, 14:31 last edited by
                              #17

                              Did you know that when you say the word "poop" your mouth moves the same way your butthole moves?

                              The same goes for "explosive diahrrea"....

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              • J Offline
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                                jon-nyc
                                wrote on 9 May 2020, 14:45 last edited by
                                #18

                                If after the lockdown you were given 2 options:

                                Fly with your wife to a dream destination or have a BBQ with the guys, what would you choose?

                                1. Rare,
                                2. Medium rare or
                                3. Medium?

                                You were warned.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                • L Offline
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                                  Larry
                                  wrote on 12 May 2020, 01:20 last edited by
                                  #19

                                  So.. in this difficult time we should all endeavor to lend a helping hand to others when we can. Just today I helped my neighbor bury a large rug in the woods behind her house.

                                  Her husband would have helped, but he's out of town.....

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  • L Offline
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                                    Larry
                                    wrote on 12 May 2020, 01:22 last edited by
                                    #20

                                    My wife said she's leaving me because she's sick and tired of my "weird sexual fetishes"..

                                    So I said "oh yeah? Well just slam the door on my pecker when you leave!!"

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • L Offline
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                                      Larry
                                      wrote on 12 May 2020, 01:23 last edited by
                                      #21

                                      I don't trust people who have fruit fetishes..

                                      They usually come in pears....

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • J Offline
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                                        jon-nyc
                                        wrote on 15 May 2020, 01:53 last edited by
                                        #22

                                        Since hockey has been canceled, nobody has seen the Zamboni driver.

                                        But don’t worry. He’ll resurface eventually.

                                        You were warned.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        • L Offline
                                          L Offline
                                          Larry
                                          wrote on 15 May 2020, 15:38 last edited by
                                          #23

                                          So.. the world's oldest man died today....

                                          Why does this keep happening?.....

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