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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. How to wipe your butt the right way

How to wipe your butt the right way

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  • AxtremusA Away
    AxtremusA Away
    Axtremus
    wrote on last edited by
    #9

    A more concise and operationally comprehensive way of saying it is "if you have another bodily orifice near the anus, wipe away from the other orifice."

    For those who have learnt object-oriented programming, it's simply knowing the difference between the "is a" relationship and the "has a" relationship.

    It's quite unnecessary to pass the whole object or implicate the whole class when all you need operationally is to check one attribute of an instance -- whether there is another bodily orifice near the anus -- to determine the recommended wipe direction.

    Minimal dependency on extraneous information, lower risk of complications and easier maintenance down the line.

    1 Reply Last reply
    • jon-nycJ Offline
      jon-nycJ Offline
      jon-nyc
      wrote on last edited by
      #10

      An even more concise way is ‘women should wipe front to back’.

      They’ll end up, after a lot of drama, with the same formula they use every time they have a trifecta: take away health care and food assistance from low income families and use the money to fund tax cuts for their donors.

      AxtremusA 1 Reply Last reply
      • jon-nycJ jon-nyc

        An even more concise way is ‘women should wipe front to back’.

        AxtremusA Away
        AxtremusA Away
        Axtremus
        wrote on last edited by Axtremus
        #11

        @jon-nyc said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

        An even more concise way is ‘women should wipe front to back’.

        That would not include eunuchs (depends on how the castration was done) and boys with severe hypospadias and undescended testicles, or other congenital abnormalities, injuries, physiological and medical conditions not captured by the term “women.” Functionally, it really is about whether there is another bodily orifice near the anus, and to wipe away from it if there is.

        George KG jon-nycJ 2 Replies Last reply
        • MikM Away
          MikM Away
          Mik
          wrote on last edited by
          #12

          This got more comments than I expected.

          “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

          1 Reply Last reply
          • AxtremusA Axtremus

            @jon-nyc said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

            An even more concise way is ‘women should wipe front to back’.

            That would not include eunuchs (depends on how the castration was done) and boys with severe hypospadias and undescended testicles, or other congenital abnormalities, injuries, physiological and medical conditions not captured by the term “women.” Functionally, it really is about whether there is another bodily orifice near the anus, and to wipe away from it if there is.

            George KG Offline
            George KG Offline
            George K
            wrote on last edited by
            #13

            @Axtremus said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

            severe hypospadias

            Never heard of a hypospadias being posterior to the scrotum. At the scrotum, perhaps, but never posterior to it.

            and undescended testicles

            That has nothing to do with orifices.

            By the way...what's the EKG sign of a hypospadia?

            ekg-ecg-interpretation-p-qrs-st-t-wave-3393849010.jpg

            ***the answer.***

            click to show

            Inverted "P".

            "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

            The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

            bachophileB 1 Reply Last reply
            • AxtremusA Axtremus

              @jon-nyc said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

              An even more concise way is ‘women should wipe front to back’.

              That would not include eunuchs (depends on how the castration was done) and boys with severe hypospadias and undescended testicles, or other congenital abnormalities, injuries, physiological and medical conditions not captured by the term “women.” Functionally, it really is about whether there is another bodily orifice near the anus, and to wipe away from it if there is.

              jon-nycJ Offline
              jon-nycJ Offline
              jon-nyc
              wrote on last edited by jon-nyc
              #14

              @Axtremus said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

              @jon-nyc said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

              An even more concise way is ‘women should wipe front to back’.

              That would not include eunuchs (depends on how the castration was done) and boys with severe hypospadias and undescended testicles, or other congenital abnormalities, injuries, physiological and medical conditions not captured by the term “women.” Functionally, it really is about whether there is another bodily orifice near the anus, and to wipe away from it if there is.

              On the highly unlikely chance that there’s any overlap between the set of people with such conditions and the set of people who will read this article, when they read the reasoning behind the advice given to women they will be able to figure out if it applies to them.

              At any rate this deconstruction of women into parts and functions is misogynistic and should be discouraged.

              They’ll end up, after a lot of drama, with the same formula they use every time they have a trifecta: take away health care and food assistance from low income families and use the money to fund tax cuts for their donors.

              1 Reply Last reply
              • MikM Away
                MikM Away
                Mik
                wrote on last edited by
                #15

                👆

                “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

                1 Reply Last reply
                • George KG George K

                  @Axtremus said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

                  severe hypospadias

                  Never heard of a hypospadias being posterior to the scrotum. At the scrotum, perhaps, but never posterior to it.

                  and undescended testicles

                  That has nothing to do with orifices.

                  By the way...what's the EKG sign of a hypospadia?

                  ekg-ecg-interpretation-p-qrs-st-t-wave-3393849010.jpg

                  ***the answer.***

                  click to show

                  Inverted "P".

                  bachophileB Offline
                  bachophileB Offline
                  bachophile
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #16

                  @George-K said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

                  @Axtremus said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

                  severe hypospadias

                  Never heard of a hypospadias being posterior to the scrotum. At the scrotum, perhaps, but never posterior to it.

                  and undescended testicles

                  That has nothing to do with orifices.

                  By the way...what's the EKG sign of a hypospadia?

                  ekg-ecg-interpretation-p-qrs-st-t-wave-3393849010.jpg

                  ***the answer.***

                  click to show

                  Inverted "P".

                  You understand that I’m the only one here besides you who has ever heard of a p wave.

                  George KG 1 Reply Last reply
                  • bachophileB bachophile

                    @George-K said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

                    @Axtremus said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

                    severe hypospadias

                    Never heard of a hypospadias being posterior to the scrotum. At the scrotum, perhaps, but never posterior to it.

                    and undescended testicles

                    That has nothing to do with orifices.

                    By the way...what's the EKG sign of a hypospadia?

                    ekg-ecg-interpretation-p-qrs-st-t-wave-3393849010.jpg

                    ***the answer.***

                    click to show

                    Inverted "P".

                    You understand that I’m the only one here besides you who has ever heard of a p wave.

                    George KG Offline
                    George KG Offline
                    George K
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #17

                    @bachophile said in How to wipe your butt the right way:

                    You understand that I’m the only one here besides you who has ever heard of a p wave.

                    Of course.

                    However, I always make a point of telling that joke whenever someone mentions "hypospadia."

                    Even if the anticipated audience is only one.

                    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    • MikM Away
                      MikM Away
                      Mik
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #18

                      Not so! I have.

                      “I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ~Winston S. Churchill

                      1 Reply Last reply
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