I saw this tweet and thought of Aqua
-
“per my last email” = fuck you
“apologies for the delay” = fuck me
“cc’ing for visibility” = you’re fucked
“checking in in this” = i’m fucked
“let’s revisit in Q4” = fuck this
“i’m not sure that’s aligned” = fuck that
“respectfully yours” = fuck all y’all
“let me know if you need anything else” = give me something, fucking anything
“could you clarify” = this is some fucking bullshit
“i hope this email finds you well” = i couldn’t give a fuck as long as this email finds you
“attaching below” = oh fuck actually i forgot
“please reply” = fuck it Hail Mary time
“let’s discuss on our next check in” = for fuck’s sake
“due to the blockers previously discussed we’re unable to complete this project as originally planned” = we’re fucked
“unsubscribe” = fuck off
“please advise” = what the fuck does this even mean
“after careful consideration” = i’m about to fuck shit up
“respectfully” = fuck no
-
I had to step in and finish a project for a woman who went out on maternity leave. Got the correspondence she's had with the folks she's doing the work for. A whole littany of nonsense "we don't like this, do what we say" feedback, and every single time, her response was "please clarify."
These folks expressed a lot of relief when we met up to discuss how to finish the work. "Really excited" to get some "fresh eyes" on everything.
So they gave me similar feedback and I politely asked them to clarify.
Hey, it's not my project. Far be it from me to change up the working relationship so late in the game. That would be presumptuous.
-
@Mik said in I saw this tweet and thought of Aqua:
They need a medium, not a writer.
Indeed.
They also don't know why six-year-olds don't write their own children's books.
-
Children's books are written by celebrity females who want to check off "published author" on their bucket list.
@Horace said in I saw this tweet and thought of Aqua:
Children's books are written by celebrity females who want to check off "published author" on their bucket list.
Yes but they generally don't win Caldecotts for them.
