It's Too Much
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After a year of navigating lockdowns and a constant barrage of dizzying messaging telling us what we can and can’t do, I’ve noticed a troubling theme when it comes to motherhood: “It’s too much.” Recent studies have confirmed this, with stress, depression and anxiety among moms rising to concerning heights.
As a mom of two middle schoolers, I have easily let these emotions seep in as we’ve navigated distance learning, argued over places to get some personal space in our home and wrestled with the need for social interactions with friends who may not share the same philosophies on gathering.
But as a Christian mom, I think there is something deeper going on in our souls than just the effects of a global pandemic.
The truth is, 38 years ago, before this generation of moms was even born, our society made a decision affecting hundreds of millions of parents and children. When abortion was legalized, we wrote it into law; women can choose if a child would be “too much.”
In our culture, we are told children should rank below attending college, below the ability to go out at your leisure. They are to rank below exercising at the gym, below any job you may have or financial stability you hope to achieve. Children rank below your desire to focus on your own “self-care.” In fact, there is a creeping normalization that it’s OK to regret having children.
If you grow up in this narrative, it is very hard to get a biblical perspective on motherhood. We have collectively bought into the cultural lie that motherhood means the death of your previous self, that motherhood is a rock-bottom job to be feared and avoided.
But popular culture is wrong. Motherhood is a gift; it’s a calling. And while it’s not a role for the faint of heart, it’s a role created by God as an opportunity to shape the future.
As Psalm 127:4 says, “Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth.” Children are arrows. And we’re the warriors who launch them. These arrows we carve, shape and balance are going to reach far beyond the present. They’re what God is going to use tomorrow. As the nations rage, it's our children who will be on the offense. And we are the ones to direct these arrows for that role.
That’s a tall order and a seemingly impossible role that goes beyond the current cultural celebration of self. Christian moms are working in enemy territory while the world rages and crumbles and tells us that our future is more important than our children’s. But that’s why Galatians 2:20 says, “It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me.”
Without a biblical perspective, the thought of laying down your own life, as Christians are called to do, is terrifying. It is that very fear that drives the abortion industry: fear that your dreams will die, that your future will die, that your freedom will die.
But for Christians, death to self is not the end of the story. We know what follows death. The Christian life is resurrection life, a life that conquers death.
Our culture says children are burdensome, that they are just too hard, too challenging, too much. But God says children are gifts. Yes, they can be difficult. Yes, they can absolutely push us to our limits. Motherhood is a selfless opportunity to impact generations to come. And it’s a gift we shouldn’t take lightly.
https://townhall.com/columnists/meganwest/2021/05/09/being-a-mother-is-not-too-much-n2589127
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@jolly said in It's Too Much:
In our culture, we are told children should rank below attending college, below the ability to go out at your leisure. They are to rank below exercising at the gym, below any job you may have or financial stability you hope to achieve. Children rank below your desire to focus on your own “self-care.” In fact, there is a creeping normalization that it’s OK to regret having children.
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If you grow up in this narrative, it is very hard to get a biblical perspective on motherhood. We have collectively bought into the cultural lie that motherhood means the death of your previous self, that motherhood is a rock-bottom job to be feared and avoided.-
I don't think "our culture" tells people that children "should" rank below that list of things she rattles off, except college. I think our culture does by and large tell people to get a college education before having kids, and that I think is the right priority for most people given where our society is today. As for gym or job or financial stability, I think mostly we just let people choose for themselves what they think is important. If you look at all the child-centric welfare programs and tax incentives that are on the book, as well as the proposed expansion of the child tax credits, universal pre-K, family leaves, child care subsidies, etc., coming from the Dems (e.g., Biden's American Families Plan) and the GOP (e.g., Romney's recent child tax credit proposal), it is quite clear that we as a society are trying quite hard to encourage child bearing, to support motherhood, to make parenthood easier.
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Biblical perspective on motherhood, like Buddhist perspective on motherhood or Hindu perspective on motherhood or Confucian perspective on motherhood ... are all way too outdated. There were all formed when women were considered subservient to men, when infant mortality rates were very high, when producing farm hands had very direct correlations to farm productivity. I would encourage her to get a more updated worldview with regards to parenthood in general.
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Human nature is human nature and has not changed for thousands of years. Many things, in fact most things of a personal nature, are the same today as it was when Jesus or Buddha trod the earth...
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Human nature is human nature and has not changed for thousands of years. Many things, in fact most things of a personal nature, are the same today as it was when Jesus or Buddha trod the earth...
@jolly said in It's Too Much:
Human nature is human nature and has not changed for thousands of years. Many things, in fact most things of a personal nature, are the same today as it was when Jesus or Buddha trod the earth...
You deny reality if you think a life time average of 2.3 live births with near 100% survival rate somehow does not change "motherhood" compared to a life time average of 14 attempts at live births with 50% mortality rate.
