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The New Coffee Room

  1. TNCR
  2. General Discussion
  3. So....

So....

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  • L Offline
    L Offline
    Larry
    wrote on 16 Oct 2021, 19:38 last edited by
    #372

    So.... the guy who invented the Ferris wheel never met the guy who invented the merry go round.

    They traveled in different circles....

    1 Reply Last reply
    • G Offline
      G Offline
      George K
      wrote on 17 Oct 2021, 11:23 last edited by George K
      #373

      I bought a new truck. It'll run on hydrogen, gasoline, or E85. Had to go back to the dealer yesterday because I couldn't get the radio to work. The service technician explained that the radio was voice-activated.

      ”Nelson,” the technician said to the radio. The radio replied, “Ricky or Willie? ”Willie” he continued, and “On The Road Again” flowed from the speakers. Then he said, “Ray Charles,” and in an instant “Georgia On My Mind” replaced Willie Nelson.

      I drove away so happy, and for the next few days every time I'd say, “Beethoven” I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said, “Beatles” I'd get one of their awesome songs.

      Well, yesterday, this woman ran a red light and nearly smashed into my new truck, but luckily I swerved in time to avoid her. I yelled at her, “Crazy Bitch!”

      The radio replied, “Hillary, Maxine, Kamala, Warren, Ocasio, or Pelosi?”

      GOD, I love this truck!

      "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

      The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

      1 Reply Last reply
      • C Offline
        C Offline
        Catseye3
        wrote on 17 Oct 2021, 23:09 last edited by
        #374

        Why does a moon rock taste better than an earth rock?

        Because it's a little meteor.

        Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

        G 1 Reply Last reply 17 Oct 2021, 23:20
        • C Catseye3
          17 Oct 2021, 23:09

          Why does a moon rock taste better than an earth rock?

          Because it's a little meteor.

          G Offline
          G Offline
          George K
          wrote on 17 Oct 2021, 23:20 last edited by
          #375

          @catseye3 said in So....:

          Because it's a little meteor.

          Stealing that one for future use....

          "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

          The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

          1 Reply Last reply
          • J Online
            J Online
            jon-nyc
            wrote on 18 Oct 2021, 20:04 last edited by
            #376

            I hate hotel bathrobes. So thick and fluffy I can barely close my suitcase.

            "You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from."
            -Cormac McCarthy

            1 Reply Last reply
            • L Offline
              L Offline
              Larry
              wrote on 18 Oct 2021, 23:45 last edited by
              #377

              I don't understand what's so great about Switzerland, although its flag is a big plus.

              1 Reply Last reply
              • L Offline
                L Offline
                Larry
                wrote on 18 Oct 2021, 23:50 last edited by
                #378

                So... there was a kidnapping at the local high school today....

                It's ok though, he finally woke up....

                1 Reply Last reply
                • L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Larry
                  wrote on 18 Oct 2021, 23:53 last edited by
                  #379

                  So.... You might bevamerican before you go in the toilet, but once you get inside European.

                  G 1 Reply Last reply 18 Oct 2021, 23:54
                  • L Larry
                    18 Oct 2021, 23:53

                    So.... You might bevamerican before you go in the toilet, but once you get inside European.

                    G Offline
                    G Offline
                    George K
                    wrote on 18 Oct 2021, 23:54 last edited by
                    #380

                    @larry said in So....:

                    So.... You might bevamerican before you go in the toilet, but once you get inside European.

                    Until you're Finnish...

                    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                    L 1 Reply Last reply 18 Oct 2021, 23:57
                    • L Offline
                      L Offline
                      Larry
                      wrote on 18 Oct 2021, 23:55 last edited by
                      #381

                      I've been thinking about taking up meditation....

                      It beats sitting around doing nothing,.....

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      • G George K
                        18 Oct 2021, 23:54

                        @larry said in So....:

                        So.... You might bevamerican before you go in the toilet, but once you get inside European.

                        Until you're Finnish...

                        L Offline
                        L Offline
                        Larry
                        wrote on 18 Oct 2021, 23:57 last edited by
                        #382

                        @george-k said in So....:

                        @larry said in So....:

                        So.... You might bevamerican before you go in the toilet, but once you get inside European.

                        Until you're Finnish...

                        Bahahaha

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        • L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Larry
                          wrote on 18 Oct 2021, 23:58 last edited by
                          #383

                          I was going to tell a time traveling joke but you guys didn't get it.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          • L Offline
                            L Offline
                            Larry
                            wrote on 19 Oct 2021, 00:00 last edited by
                            #384

                            Me: "Doctor... i keep hearing a buzzing sound!"

                            Dr: " don't worry, it's just a bug that's going around.."

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            • L Offline
                              L Offline
                              Larry
                              wrote on 19 Oct 2021, 00:05 last edited by
                              #385

                              A drummer friend of mine and his wife just had twin girls.

                              They named them Anna.

                              Anna one, Anna two.......

                              T 1 Reply Last reply 25 Oct 2021, 15:05
                              • C Offline
                                C Offline
                                Catseye3
                                wrote on 20 Oct 2021, 01:03 last edited by
                                #386

                                Q: What did the average Patriot player get on the Wonderlic test?

                                A: Drool.

                                Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. – Mike Ditka

                                J 1 Reply Last reply 20 Oct 2021, 02:49
                                • C Catseye3
                                  20 Oct 2021, 01:03

                                  Q: What did the average Patriot player get on the Wonderlic test?

                                  A: Drool.

                                  J Online
                                  J Online
                                  jon-nyc
                                  wrote on 20 Oct 2021, 02:49 last edited by
                                  #387

                                  @catseye3 said in So....:

                                  Q: What did the average Patriot player get on the Wonderlic test?

                                  A: Drool.

                                  lolol

                                  "You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from."
                                  -Cormac McCarthy

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  • G Offline
                                    G Offline
                                    George K
                                    wrote on 22 Oct 2021, 21:53 last edited by
                                    #388

                                    How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb?

                                    Just Juan.

                                    "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                    The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    • G Offline
                                      G Offline
                                      George K
                                      wrote on 22 Oct 2021, 21:55 last edited by George K
                                      #389

                                      I'm not sure if I'm an asshole or just an introvert.

                                      (Yeah, go ahead and embrace the wonderful power of and.)

                                      "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08

                                      The saying, "Lite is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      • L Offline
                                        L Offline
                                        Larry
                                        wrote on 22 Oct 2021, 23:20 last edited by
                                        #390

                                        @george-k said in So....:

                                        How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb?

                                        Just Juan.

                                        Mexican word of the day:

                                        Chicken finger

                                        "My Juanita say she no need me no more cause chicken finger herself"

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        • L Offline
                                          L Offline
                                          Larry
                                          wrote on 25 Oct 2021, 00:31 last edited by
                                          #391

                                          So...., Albert Einstein's little brother Frank was an absolute monster...

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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