Pretty good. i was I think 24.
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Let’s not get him started on Wordle scores -
Marriage adviceYou might start by asking what you might do to help her. You're not going to get through this by thinking you're doing enough already. I understand the feeling, but it's not helpful. It's never 50-50. Whatever you do, avoid making it confrontational. If she does talk, just listen and firmly resist the urge to provide a solution. It is difficult because as guys, that's what we do - we fix stuff. It will feel a bit like patronizing her, but trust me, it's not. It's something I cannot grasp emotionally, but I acknowledge it on an intellectual level.
You seem to be picking up on being indirect.
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Chilling video essay re authoritarianism@Renauda said in Chilling video essay re authoritarianism:
Vlad, as always, raises some salient points. As he should, he knows what he sees.
As to travel, right now I wouldn’t even consider changing flights in the US let alone entering it as a tourist.
Several of my Canadian relatives feel the same way.
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Chilling video essay re authoritarianismBeing in any position of authority for too long inevitably results in overreach of one form or another. I've experienced it in my own elected positions. It surprised me to see my own deterioration in that respect.
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Marriage adviceI disagree. Living with the intolerable silently will foster resentment which will inevitably erode your relationship. It is possible that the reason it becomes a big fight is because she knows something is wrong, feels overwhelmed and is scared or unable for whatever reason to confront it. It's your duty as her husband to help her work through this. Just don't expect instant results.
It's often difficult to see a path forward when you are up to your neck in a situation. Some counseling for you on how to start working through this might help. The first place you might go is AI. You need fresh input.
When our daughter was born Janet became a stay at home mom. After a highly successful sales career she found it stifling and was conflicted about that, as if she should not feel that way. Your bride may be feeling some form of that and using the dopamine hit from purchasing wonderful new things to cope, while still feeling unfulfilled. She's spent family money on all these things and would feel guilty discarding them. I know a lot of people who employ retail therapy.
The key words here are gentle and loving. She needs to know her feelings will land in a safe place with you, just as you would do with your kids. I'm a pretty direct person by and large and I found that the way I responded to things did not always make her feel safe. Took me a long time to learn when my natural response to something was not going to be helpful.
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Let’s not get him started on Wordle scores -
Calibri v. Times New Roman@89th said in Calibri v. Times New Roman:
I'm just trying to visualize how some of this Administration's dumber moves actually come about...
Visualize this (h/t @wtg, also involves Rubio's department):
Feds bring woman to US to face charges, then say she’s here illegally [and wants to deport her before she's tried]
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Marriage adviceCarve out for yourself a "man cave" where you can be as tidy as you want. Bring your kids to see your man cave every now and then so they see there is another way of living. Leave her be.
Who knows what pregnancies have done to her hormones to push her hoarder's subconscious to the surface? Pregnancies are very big deals that leave long lasting effects on the body and mind. Give it time, maybe lots of time, for the hormonal levels to revert. After the kids grow up to the point where the kids spend more time away from home, she may want to go back to work and that may again change her domestic behaviors and tendencies.
Oh, after you get this off your chest and collected the advice, delete this thread before she sees it. In the old days these would be things you tell a few of your confidants who would exercise discretion rather than posting on the open Internet where it's readily searchable by your wife and her confidants.
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Marriage adviceWhat did she do before she was a mom? What’s her family like? I’d say she’s missing or afraid of something and it’s time to find out what it is.
